I just spent a lovely weekend with my Master. E knew that I desperately needed some in person submission as long distance just isn't the same, especially when life is so busy. After helping me bring in my things from the car and giving me a big hug, he had me kneel on a padded stool (so he can reach me better, he's tall,) then pulled off my dress and fastened the collar around my neck as I held up my hair.
I had to get up on my knees on the stool as my ankles were hurting so I held onto to his shoulders, making sure to keep my breasts exposed for him of course. God, looking into his eyes while I'm whimpering from the pain and pleasure as he squeezes and pinches makes me shiver. While he smiles and tells me softly that my whimpers turn him on, that he loves it when I suffer for him, and then cumming from that, as he has trained me to do - sooo satisfying!
We also tried a few new things over the weekend, of which my favorite was probably cockwarming and cock & ball worship. I recently read someone's very helpful post about it on here and had to try it.
I've always loved giving head and I'm always turned on by it, but I've never just had a cock in my mouth without intent, so to speak, just keeping it there and suckling gently off and on. It made me happy to do something that he enjoys, and I found it very sensual and comforting. My submissive feelings were also triggered by this as I was lying between his legs with my head cushioned on his thigh, as though in my proper place.
I also enjoyed cock & ball worship, gently running my tongue up and down and around his balls, finding and noting the spots that made him catch his breath, licking from his taint all the way up, just taking my time and enjoying it. He eventually started fucking my face, which I love.
Sunday morning he got up and fed his dogs, and then lounged in the living room, dozing in front of sports while I was still asleep. I woke up a little later and went out to join him. I laid down for a cuddle - we both love cuddles - and then I slid down to cockwarm him. What a delicious way to wake up on a Sunday. Fortunately E isn't one of those who doesn't like a slave to take initiative, because I needed to please him, and I wanted his cock in my mouth.
So he was ok with that, and I laid there suckling gently on his cock and licking his balls and taint for a while. While my pleasure was not the point of this, it does really turn me on and I had several orgasms from the lovely sensations combined with the thought of serving my Master this way, like his useful little slut. After a while he turned so he could trap my head in place with his leg so he could face-fuck me hard which made me cum even more.
I told him after that I love it when he uses me hard. God it's so hard to describe the feeling I get when I'm nothing more than his slut. I'm not A slut, I am HIS slut - there is a difference. The more he uses me and tells me what a good slave I'm turning into, what a good little dirty whore I am for him, the more turned on I get, but I also feel incredibly fulfilled. Then I'm not the corporate leader, or "the one" who has to take care of everything from the house to the yard to the cars, etc.
He respects those parts of me, yes. But when I'm lying on my back with my head hanging off the bed, and he's shoving his cock down my throat and using his hands to push my legs open and slap my pussy or squeeze my breasts, doing whatever makes HIM happy, it makes ME happy. I feel valued by this man as a woman, and I feel intensely feminine and sexy. I feel owned. I feel relaxed, knowing that I only have to be a girl. In those moments I am happy to be his slut - nothing more, but also nothing less.