Buckle in darlings, Lady Kat has a wild one for you today.
Last time I brought you a snippet of my family concerning me with their ideas on what a spouse to be should be told prior to marriage. The healthy answer is EVERYTHING, but that’s not this story.
No this story is from the foolish people who have lost what little sense they were born with, or at least that’s what it looks like from where I’m sitting.
Now I am not a cruel person normally, so I’ll not name the ridiculous individuals on the off chance they ever find this blog and miraculously learn to read.
I left the house today, wearing my normal attire, my usual makeup, and with my customary “leave me alone” aura reserved for when the university students have returned. In other words, nothing about my appearance said “come bother me!”
I’ll be thrice damned if that isn’t what two young people of questionable mental faculties decide to do. Two of the finest fools recruited to a religious cult I’ve ever come across.
I’d like to add the disclaimer that I do not disparage all people attempting to spread their faith. Just the ones who choose to harass me about my business.
I finished my errands and this pair of prized idiots were waiting outside, pamphlets in hand and bothering everyone leaving the shopping center. When they attempted to stop me I looked down on them like something I’d stepped in and for the first time, they continued talking at me.
Had I lost my touch? Am I deathly ill? Perhaps the idiot was visually impaired? No, it was far worse!
This walking blight on the gene pool targeted me specifically because of my clothing and makeup. Goth lady must be a sinner! She wants me to save her soul so she can be a normal pretty girl I can prey on.
I could see the warring disgust and attraction behind the idiot’s eyes. Revulsion built so quickly behind mine no one could have hidden it. The fool's partner in imbecility certainly picked up on it.
Did he warn his friend away from me, perhaps clueing him in I looked ready fo squash him like a particularly large garden pest?
No he declared I had “demons in my heart”.
Ok you wanna play? Let’s have a little fun. I widened my eyes and split my black painted lips into a massive grin. Standing to my full height they had to look up and bit by tiny bit, they began to see their mistakes.
“Oh what fun!” I said in my best talking-to-small-children voice, “you’ve caught on already! Though I much prefer demons in my bed!”
Watching these two “men” of God realize what I said at the same time and scramble away like I’d burned the very air around me?
I’m definitely using this one again.
