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The Culture that has been here all the time

When I studied to acquire my Master's status I discovered the M/S relationship existed probably for all the history of humans. Religion and Western Culture distort this greatly. Using codes and euphemisms even denial masks it presents the fact many people thrive within this often unrecognized subculture. For example, my wife had all the earmarks of a pleasure slave and was generally devoted and submissive to me. In times of marriage friction, I often heard the words from a counselor, "She just wants you to love her" "Love her" I thought I was and did now I know without a doubt I need to be a master, not some preconceived idea we are to live as equals.
4 months ago. November 23, 2024 at 4:58 PM

With ideas, until I was diagnosed with bipolar, the only thing doctors thought was that I was clinically depressed. I am very creative but jump from one writing, art, and music project to another. Deans list, honor society, and scholarships when I am up, but hiding and frustrated when I am down. At times even angry. That is why I am so glad I admitted I am an alcoholic because alcohol is flammable.

I dream that one day, I will have a muse who can tame the wildness of my creativity to accomplish more opuses—a book and an epic, perhaps.

One thing I realized about change recently (within the last thirty minutes) is that once something is gone from your life, you won't miss it if you allow it to be processed away. I realize now since my wife's ADA negated sexual intimacy, I am finally starting to get it out of my mind so soon, I will be free, and my libido can go to . . . I'd say hell, but I don't believe in hell we are already in hell right here on Earth. At least I am.

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