Sorry for another post tonight, I just have a lot on my mind and writing helps...
I've been burned in all of my Relationships. I was abused, then used and ghosted in my Vanilla and not Vanilla relationships. I feel like my none vanilla side I need to protect and keep safe, I don't want them to hurt the way I've been hurt. Gosh I know how crazy that sounds, but I feel like I have to lock it away.
Everytime I come on here I get burned. I get told to leave this site cause the Doms I pick seem to like that control, but then they hurt both sides of me and that not fair to me. Call it being whiney or needy or whatever you want to call it.
I just want to feel safe being free to be my true real self. I want to be taken care.
I feel like locking away my needs and wants is the safest thing for me but at the same time I dont want to not be my true self....