Princess Sparkalina(sub female)

Splashes of Sparkle

If only i were a duck

5 years ago. April 13, 2019 at 8:48 PM

I am a very caring and passionate person. I have a depth that most people don't get to see. I love deeply and I care deeply. I carry the weight of the world sometimes on my shoulders. I have a heart that was created to be submissive. Having said that, I am also fiery and passionate, protective and crazy. Don't let my sweetness or my naive and innocent sides fool you. Poke the dragon too much and FIRE will and does come out!Yes, friends, even now I am frustrated.

Today it was suggested to me that i am not submissive at all. That people who wait for things to go their way or they just pick up the ball and go home are not submissive. That perhaps i needed a submissive to call my own... -

I suggested that a wise Dom once told me if a submissive isn't doing, or acting, or responding how you want her to act, then take time to teach her to be who you want her to be. She isn't a mind reader, she doesn't just know. (Even if you think said things are universal and just expected) I was told "that is advice I give baby Doms". I was called a smart ass. I was NOT being a smart ass, i was simply trying to make a point. It didn't work.

Of course there is a longer story behind this, but I am SO frustrated right now. Sparkly frustration is not pretty. Yes perhaps i should be more like a duck and just let it roll off my back, but instead at this very moment i am fired up.And I am not a duck....and those words are not rolling off! Instead i keep hearing them over and over and over again. I don't need to defend myself. I know i make mistakes too. The whole situation just has me irritated. I would not be any good to have a submissive of my own-I am not Dominant. Yes, I am strong willed and opinionated-yes my life has many unique pieces of the puzzle to make this work-Yes, I am not like all the other girls....but Dominant i am not.

I could let my brain loose down the rabbit hole and ponder the thought that I am not submissive either. That maybe I just need to throw the towel in....but, I know several people here who love me dearly that might have a few strong words to say about that.*sigh* one day these things won't bother me like this. but today is not that day.

I go to the Dungeon tonight, perhaps I will find some stress relief there...

P.S. trash-talking my former partners will not bring the respect you're looking for

Asteria(neither female) - *hugs*
Sometimes opinions need to be only that- opinions. You know yourself and those who are the closest to you probably know you as well. This is what matters. Don't let such words to bring you down.

5 years ago

Wiseonthree(dom male) - Hey, I too am pretty much all of those things. Minus the submissive parts, I think there is a real thing that people seem to be missing. I found a real good article as to WHY someone would submit and as to what they would be submitting. Not every dynamic is exactly the same, not every submissive needs someone to tell them how to breath, how to blow their nose and brush their teeth.

To cut to the point: You have the right to be frustrated, sounds like that person (or people) didn’t listen to you and only had themselves in mind. I hope you get some relief this evening, hang in there.

5 years ago

Brown Eyed Girl(sub female) - Whose butt do I need to help you kick(just kidding : ) kind of lol)

5 years ago

Bunnie - I have been in this situation... as I’m sure many have. It really really hurt... for two reasons. Being called something you *know* you’re not. And realising that the person doesn’t see the real you. Ouch. I’m sorry you’re experiencing this because it sucks big time.

As I do, I went away and thought about it a lot, because even if it hurts, I appreciate feedback, because for me personally, I can’t see myself as others do, and a lot of times people have pointed out things to me that I’ve missed about myself.
Anyway, finally after a lot of digging and reflection, it came down to one simple realisation for me...

do I get nourishment from dominating people or submitting to them.

It’s not about the “actions” involved imo, it’s about what feeds our soul. I realised that even if someone else saw me as a Dominant, and even if I could successfully feed their submissive needs... I would get no nourishment from it other than the satisfaction of pleasing them.

That’s when I learned two things... we each see something different in each other because we each draw different things out of each other. And my nourishment comes from subservience.

That’s when a huge shift occurred, and I finally accepted myself as a submissive. The desire to need to “prove” myself as a submissive and prove my submissiveness, so that I felt that I belonged, and was justified in being “here,” simply fell away.

My point is, sometimes things like this can be a blessing in disguise. It’s not about “water off a ducks back.” Don’t ignore it... but do find what it means to you :)

5 years ago

HGB(sub female){Scottish M} - I am never the duck. I'm the kitchen sponge. I need to learn to be the duck, and shake my tail as I walk away. Hehe

5 years ago

Morley(sub female){Max Sterne} - Sparkalina - I don't (as rare as it is) have words here other than just LOVE ❤️❤️❤️

5 years ago

Savida(other female) - Those who matter don’t mind (a strong FIERCE gorgeous sparkly wonderful lady with a brain and a backbone) and those who mind don’t matter (and are on the whole, weak minded dullards)

5 years ago

Morley(sub female){Max Sterne} - Not to take away from the post, but cant stop giggling about "Dullard's" 🤣🤣🤣

5 years ago

Ingénue{VK} - If you're a duck, he has anatidaephobia.
People can be inadequate.

5 years ago

Princess Sparkalina(sub female) - 😂

5 years ago

Ingénue{VK} - It's not often I get to use that word. It's one of my favourites. Thank you.

5 years ago

Curlyniccia{Protected} - After being told I'm more dominant than submissive, I decided to really look into who I was. This is what i came up with. Submissiveness is as individual as the person themselves. Our submissiveness is formed from our experiences, our personality and likes and wants. No two submissive can be the same. As no two Doms are the same. The person you eventually will call your Dom will like you based on you. All the things that make you different he will love about you. For he would have chosen you for your uniqueness. He would have seen something he likes in you. What makes you different will be how he ultimately finds you. Find beauty in your differences. I for one am like you, I am strong, confident and self aware. I will roar when I need to. I stand up for myself. I am not needy. But that doesn't make me a Dominant. My heart is that of a submissive. X

5 years ago

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Princess Sparkalina​(sub female)

Splashes of Sparkle

If only i were a duck

Princess Sparkalina(sub female)