The day was bright and vivid. tall green grasses swayed in the breeze, wispy clouds swirled against the bright sky. Barefoot steps made their way across fresh earth, Summer has arrived. She paused and inhaled deeply and released it slowly, eyes closed and face up to the sky. She felt the light of the sun but there was no warmth on her skin.
She had to be away, it was needed, required. She ached with emptiness, with pain, with hurt, with anger. She also felt hope, victory, and purpose. She wanted to reach out, cry out. Wanted to feel his skin, tracing each tattoo, looking at each battle scar, knowing their story.
She thought back to those nights in firelight. her naked flesh pressed to his. Shadows danced across the wall, as moonlight drifted in. She ran her fingertips over the Celtic lines, following with intensity, looking at the dark hairs, a blemish, a scar. She would pause on one and ask where it came from. She would listen intently as he retold the story, her eyes wide and nodding as he spoke.
Oh how she wished that if she opened her eyes right now she would see him standing in the near distance. That she could run to him and he would hold her close. He would hold her and not let go. Hold her so she could let go. Hold her as he body could no longer stand. Hold her as the tears began their fall. Hold her until they stopped. Hold her long after that. But he was not there when she opened her eyes. He was near, but so far away. She cannot see him or feel his warmth against her. But she could hear him, telling her to "keep going" telling her "In time"
Summer drew anger and fear from her. She wanted to fight it, but he spoke to her and guided her. She wiped the tears, felt herself calm and and the fear not as scary as she had thought. She had to wait until winter to see him again. Winter is where she wanted to be.