a place where everything is not okay

Alluracurious - Your not wrong but talk it over...

switch101​(switch male) - Her terms are that she only could punish me with (spanking, belting, caning, paddling) based on what I do wrong and to agree the punishment is not sexual but only disciplinary, and to keep our sexual switch relationship as it is
Should I agree?

Alluracurious - That is your decision...be true to yourself and it will all work out

IowaDom​(dom male) - There are a couple things that seem imperative here...
1. A real discussion on hard/soft limits - very specific
2. Time for a written agreement on the subject, regardless of what you agree on, time to put it in writing

if the contract is broken, you need to consider if you are willing to accept somebody that will continue to do that. It seems you have already set a precedent that you will, so it is time for some hard lines to "turn the tide" as they say

switch101​(switch male) - Thank you all, me and her we've had a rough history which I blogged here, and limits have always been a problem with us, I really think we should have a serious talk about the subject

IowaDom​(dom male) - twer me, both the talk and the contract wold be requirements to continue

dollMaker​(dom male) - Consent, consent, consent. Everything should, must be fully discussed and enthusiastically agreed to. Not half hearted or reluctantly. Everything is open to also having consent with drawn. Set rules and realistic punishments. Not crazy over the top punishments for minor rule breaking. Here is the thing though, even once rules are agreed and even broken, you both can say no, call red on the punishment even halt following the rules agreed to. Nothing in bdsm is fixed for always. It is and should be possible to re discuss any aspect of what you both do, and change it if its not working or isn't needed or liked, wanted anymore. Regarding limits and boundaries those should be sacred and neither of you should ever break those. Limits can be changed though, but it must be agreed to freely and never under duress. You both definitely need to have frank discussions and put down the foundation of what you do on paper, make it formal. I would also keep it simple and not make things too complex. The more complexthe harder it is to remember. Being consistent is also important, both of you should follow through on what has been agreed.

HGB​(sub female){Scottish M} - I fear this is the one you broke up with. You really need to look at yourself. Know you have value as a human. I don't like where my mind is going here. I hope it is wrong.i wish you the best.

switch101​(switch male) - She is, but we resolved most of our issues, but here comes another one

djinni​(dom female){smplylaura} - I've already given my view, but you might want to move this to the forums as not everyone reads the blogs.

switch101​(switch male) - Thank you, I will

TheChimera​(sub female) - Djinni is right, forums might be a better platform since it's... well.... forums~

A common thing I'm seeing with the responses to your blogs [I saw both] is communication.
I agree with the others.
Talk it over. Set limits.

Ultimately, I want to ask you a few questions too.

-Would letting your girlfriend punish you like so, and this agreement make YOU happy?
[From what "tone" I picked up from your blogs, I'd guess not? However, tone has a marvelous way of being lost in text. So I never like to assume.]

-You mentioned you're both switches, would that be fair in your opinion that you couldn't punish her when she gets to punish you like so?

-Would this be SAFE to you/in your limits? [Meaning that her punishments for you will be within your limits since you mentioned whipping and caning]

Just a few questions I'd ask myself before proceeding.

switch101​(switch male) - I'm okay with being punished by her when I do something wrong I believe it can make our relationship better
I don't think it's fair as we agreed it would be a sexual switch relationship at the beginning but then she said that this punishment is not sexual it's disciplinary for me which is confusing
She used to exceed my limits and we broke up for a while because of that but we got back together and she didn't exceed my limits since then

I'm okay with giving her the higher power in the relationship she cares for me and always wants the best for me
But I don't know what will that do with our relationship
We've been on and off for more than a year

TheChimera​(sub female) - Well. The answers you gave me are things I think you should tell her~ ^_~

switch101​(switch male) - We talked it over, I think we're good, thanks for the help I really appreciate it

switch101​(switch male) - I agreed on being punished and the severity of the punishment based on what I did (we listed possible events) and I don't get a say on whether I was wrong or not she decides that

She agreed on being punished but only when she agrees she did something wrong

We agreed on our limits

We agreed not to mix this with our normal sexual lives

I'm happy with those terms so thank you again