He was 8 years younger than me. Insanely brilliant. Barely legal. Did I take advantage of him or did he take advantage of me? Who really knows? We were both pretty vulnerable.
He had such a way with words. He spun poems and erotica around my aching heart.
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After the the birth of my son, I received an honorable discharge from the Army and took my leave of Ft Hood... and my husband. I had told him I was going to find employment back home so we could set up to live there. My husband reluctantly allowed.
In my mind, I thought I could break off from the marriage. This could be my chance. The husband had other ideas.
I was staying with my parents and had found a great job working as a repair technician with a government contractor. During my spare time, I played Dungeons and Dragons online in a chat room with a bunch of other people.
That’s where I met him. (That’s where I’ve met a lot of great guys, actually...it’s a bit of a pattern).
Our little characters became romantically involved... one thing led to another and we began sending stories to each other. We started talking out of character and getting to know each other.
His interest in me made me feel something I had not felt in a long time. I felt desirable. Sexy. Worth while. I felt valued and wanted.
We spoke on the phone. This was before cell phones... so I had to be careful. His voice resonated through my body. He used my full name instead of my shortened name. I used his as well. There was just something so sensual about that.
We agreed to meet for the first time at a Renaissance Festival. I forced my best friend to go with me. Absolutely nothing happened and it was the most uncomfortable experience of my entire existence. I rode an elephant and thought I had made a fool of myself until...
We talked a lot on AOL instant messenger... back when AOL was all the rage. He shot me a message that night when I got home and said “When can I see you again?”
So we made plans. I brought the kids to daycare and took the day off work. I met him in the grocery store parking lot near my house. He was dressed all in black. In a trench coat. He stepped up to me and smiled. I was so nervous. I had him drive us to the battlefield park so we could walk along one of the trails.
We talked... there were a few times it seemed like he almost would have kissed me. One time it was like in a silly movie.. I had slipped on some ice and he caught me... we spent a few moments staring at each other.
After all that we sat in his parked car and he gave me a penny and said, “For your thoughts.”
I must have turned extremely red... but I turned and stared directly at his lips and said, “I was wondering what it would be like to kiss you.”
And that was it... that kiss did me in. I think I’ve talked about this kiss before but I’ve never been kissed like that ... ever... not before... not since. He whispered all kinds of things to me throughout that kiss...
tbc