Being with him is bliss...even when he has to leave during the day.
I find myself a little lost when he leaves. Almost like when you see a kitten or a puppy right when their mother leaves them from nursing. I know that sounds weird...but that is what I imagine I look like when he leaves....blindly looking for my comfort, shaking and confused...maybe even whining.
I was watching many episodes of Shameless today and this got me thinking about all the different types of addictions people have. He even jokes with me that I am adDICKed to him. I know I am a very sexual person that could have sex all the time...especially with him...but it’s more than that. I feel more with him...I feel more everything with him. He brings me so much more pleasure in the simple things not only sexual. He can also bring me to tears quicker than anyone else on earth...for no reason even...but my feelings are very raw with him...the good and the bad. It’s odd for me...I’ve always been able to shut out the feeling very quickly before...and with him I can’t.
Either way I love being with him...even when it still feels very vulnerable. I have submitted my everything to him...and each day I try to give him some more. I hope he knows all of this through my actions...
I sit here watching him now...writing my blog...and I just want to melt into him...if anyone understands that...I don’t have to have his attention, I don’t have to have him talking to me, I don’t have to be physical with him(even though I want that too...lol)...all I want is to breathe his air, smell his skin and see his sweet eyes.
Sorry for the sap...I’m just enjoying my time and needed to express it.
Until tomorrow...