Today I fell apart and I didn't mean to. I fell apart at the seams. Fell to my knees and cried. For the first time I just wanted to be held. I don't want to decide. This stupid thing that we call pride. All bs aside. I just want to be held. A best friend. A confidant. Someone who is patient and kind and will understand when I do not want to decide. Who will understand that I am broken and I have trust issues and body image is my enemy. If only. If only this person existed. I would respect them, and cherish them, cofide and listen. Always aim to please and to succeed and to follow through and through. However with each passing day and every conversation. I have come to realize you may not exist. It may be but a fairy tale after all. But it was a great dream to end the fall.
5 years ago. January 18, 2019 at 7:46 PM