On Monday I took a chance I accepted help. I know people on here don’t really know me so I just have to admit my fault. I don’t ask for help. I figure it out. This fault causes many of my own problems. But anyway.
a friend from here on the cage called me and asked if my son wanted to work. I asked my son and he said yes.
So I drove him an hour and a half away from me and left him there. You have no idea how hard that was for me. I can’t even put this in words how hard it was for me. But I trusted the Dom on here and left my son with him. That again was hard because I have DTA……(don’t trust anyone) I have had DTA for 26 years from living in a marriage of emotional physical and mental abuse. I learned that in my area I could not trust people not even the police.
anyway I believed in my son and trusted this wonderful Dom. i cut apron string on my son. Which I’ve had a tight hold on. I’ve been living in constant fear for this year scared I’d lose one fifth of my heart. Afraid if I lost this one fifth I would be no good to the other four fifths that make up of my entire heart.
Today I came to pick my son up and what I see is more of my son back. I see pieces of him back that I thought I had lost. I had accepted the parts of him that were left, but this amazing Dom I will never be able to thank enough gave me more. I have no way of ever repaying him. He gave of himself he gave a lost young man sooooo much. How do you repay this kind of kindness this compassion.
he gave my son confidence in himself. He gave him a sense of not having to be invisible. A sense of fitting in.
He gave him this and I can see the difference in my son today. My heart is singing with joy right now.
maybe that’s what my son needed (male bonding time) something I could never give my son. For obvious reasons.
Our society has such a high stigmatism on men now a days. I could say the same words but they are different coming from another man. Man to man kind of thing.
I can only offer my deepest thank yous for your time kindness and compassion to this Dom. But I truly mean it from my entire heart.
I can only pray that he stays this way July is coming am I’m scared. After July maybe I can breathe. But for now I’m going to concentrate on what is and not dwell on the what IF’s.