Wandarae{Not lookin}

Plain Jane

Well I am just a plain Jane with simple thoughts. Bdsm is new and I love learning about it. One day I may have a relationship. I have tried a couple of times but have come to realize I get attached fast and that is not a good thing. So for now going to continue my learning.

The power of a man……… update

2 months ago. June 13, 2024 at 8:39 PM

On Monday I took a chance I accepted help. I know people on here don’t really know me so I just have to admit my fault. I don’t ask for help. I figure it out. This fault causes many of my own problems. But anyway.

a friend from here on the cage called me and asked if my son wanted to work. I asked my son and he said yes.
So I drove him an hour and a half away from me and left him there. You have no idea how hard that was for me. I can’t even put this in words how hard it was for me. But I trusted the Dom on here and left my son with him. That again was hard because I have DTA……(don’t trust anyone) I have had DTA for 26 years from living in a marriage of emotional physical and mental abuse. I learned that in my area I could not trust people not even the police.

anyway I believed in my son and trusted this wonderful Dom. i cut apron string on my son. Which I’ve had a tight hold on. I’ve been living in constant fear for this year scared I’d lose one fifth of my heart. Afraid if I lost this one fifth I would be no good to the other four fifths that make up of my entire heart.

Today I came to pick my son up and what I see is more of my son back. I see pieces of him back that I thought I had lost. I had accepted the parts of him that were left, but this amazing Dom I will never be able to thank enough gave me more. I have no way of ever repaying him. He gave of himself he gave a lost young man sooooo much. How do you repay this kind of kindness this compassion.

he gave my son confidence in himself. He gave him a sense of not having to be invisible. A sense of fitting in.

He gave him this and I can see the difference in my son today. My heart is singing with joy right now.

maybe that’s what my son needed (male bonding time) something I could never give my son. For obvious reasons.

Our society has such a high stigmatism on men now a days. I could say the same words but they are different coming from another man. Man to man kind of thing.

I can only offer my deepest thank yous for your time kindness and compassion to this Dom. But I truly mean it from my entire heart.

I can only pray that he stays this way July is coming am I’m scared. After July maybe I can breathe. But for now I’m going to concentrate on what is and not dwell on the what IF’s.

Larsapan(dom female) - 🤞🏼🧿🤗

2 months ago

Sir Don(dom male){Nt looking} - Sometimes a unexpected helping hand comes from the least thought of places.
If he is receptive of the person he was working with then it could have a positive thing for him
I am glad things went well for him.

2 months ago

lambsone - All I can say is. How wonderful for you and your son. And kudos to you for taking some hard personal steps to give your son an opportunity to fly.

2 months ago

Wandarae{Not lookin} - Thank you. But all the kudos go to the Dom who took a chance on my son.

2 months ago

Literate Lycan(dom male) - Often, for a good man, just seeing the positive impact they've left behind is the gratitude they see and feel and don't require any acknowledgment.

It's the same for a good Dominant with anyone (especially their submissive). They don't "need" a verbal acknowledgement of gratitude. Just observing they may have had a positive impact on the submissive is the benefit and blessing that makes them feel whole.

2 months ago

flitter'fly(sub female) - A man never truly feels like himself until he has a reason to be a man. Hencevwork, and also, to work with One who values the help in which Your Boy could bring.
Looks like a win win win.
For a Dominant had a chance to now bond with You but also Your Boy. That makes for Men.
And You had the rewards of a mother's l9ve and to see how You and Your child should be treated by a Man.

You and i and allot of others have been through much of the same things.
There are Real Men still out there, allow that in when possable.
Don't allow past trauma for You or Your Son to keep You locked in that trauma.
i myself am fighting demons everyday to get past that past trauma.
Fight Hard You are worthy.
Don't fight so hard to push ot away.
And now for me to take my own advice. Lol
Congratulations every small step is a victory.
ff... :):):)

2 months ago

flitter'fly(sub female) - Sorry about the spelling.
I need to
Slow
Down.
Lol 😆

2 months ago

A Minx - Wonderful news you are sharing Wandarae! I'm so happy for all of you (your Son, You and the "Mr. Wonderful" Dom)! Keep that momentum going, keep on building upon it right on into July and banish those fears! Keeping all of you close in thought, enjoy these hard fought victories along the way too, keep on going and don't give up! 💐

2 months ago

Wandarae{Not lookin} - July is a whole different story it involves the ex. Also family expectations. It also challenges the love of two brothers……. It also shows the desperation of said one man and to what length he is willing to do. Will he go overboard to win one son and lose the other even further even to the point of death.

2 months ago

A Minx - dearest Wandarae, I feel for you and your family! I may understand, just a bit, of what you are going through as I lost my (13mos. older) Brother first to drugs and then to suicide, we were always thisclose, it destroyed my family and left (almost 25 years ago to this very day) still so many unanswered questions in the aftermath and loss of my beautiful, intelligent, thoughtful and very talented friend and Big Brother.

My suggestion to you is to prepare for battle (even if it's only on behalf of your Son but REALLY it's on behalf of your entire family and for YOU too but the current fire in your belly is for your Son - and rightfully so). Every single one of you survived that old dynamic (and it is a dynamic) up till now. So, be prepared and be caring but completely (as much as you can be) unemotional in your absolutely non-negotiable requirements going into those July events. Before you get into anything with anyone (your ex and/or your other children) call it out, be plain, be simple, be clear for whatever the expectations are for July (and in this way people just CANNOT be left to their own perception, interpretation, imagination or on their own past bad behaviors, they MUST then be on their very best)! It's all spelled out, it's made very clear, it's all out in the open, there is nothing to hide and there are no hidden agendas that way!

And, who gives 2 poos what anyone "thinks" at this time, this is a matter of LIFE this is no dress rehearsal and we may not get a second chance at this (unless anyone here one thecage really knows whats behind that curtain... of life), this is no beauty, no popularity and certainly no pissing contest. Do NOT let past issues, concerns or feelings color what is going on in the HERE and NOW!

You, my dear, are on a mission, be strong, be direct, call it out for what you want or need for your Son at this moment in time. And, if people on all sides of the family cannot respect whatever is needed at this (small blip in a) moment of time, then FUCK them. Continue to do what is right and if need be then don't go, don't show up, don't engage, don't continue to live in that past... life. Keep moving on, do what is best and do what is right (for right NOW), don't look back and lastly do not have ANY regrets!

ok, stepping down from this soapbox...
Please take good care, I'm rooting for You and your Son! 😁

2 months ago

Sir Don(dom male){Nt looking} - I agree with this ⬆️⬆️
There are those that will have your back no matter what

2 months ago

Wandarae{Not lookin} - Thank you. I have a plan of action I have called in reinforcements and operations protect cute baby. Now to make sure I still don’t lose another one fifth of heart because of this action.

I have learned in this journey I am strong. I am capable and I am most importantly not going to lose to that POS. He created this but I won’t let him start construction of his glass house inside my castle. I am invisible and I lurk the outer walls of castle.

But most importantly I am not afraid to go to jail to protect what is mine. I’ve trained for years now to never let him return this family to what once was. Physically I’m not scared I fact I double dog dare him to try, I trained for this. Mentally I’m scared but ready. But need to stay on my game. Emotionally going to lie I’m scared poop less of what his actions can do. But what I do know is that I am the captain of duck tape and the master crazy glue. 🤣🤣 sorry laughter is the best medicine so why let the what IF’ s stop me from enjoying the here and now. I’m going to deal with it as it comes.

2 months ago

Ingénue{VK} - That's amazing news. Lovely to read!

2 months ago

I'mME - Wandarae,
So much packed into this one post. I understood every single bit of it. IYKYK. (If you know, you know)

It's hard to do a shift in life at our ages. Create new boundaries and people that know us will push and push. We just have to keep standing there, passively resisting for most..I'm not passive, and I never will be but I have gotten more comfortable with holding these new boundaries. Nobody else has .😂

We are at war, most people just do not recognize it, but that day is coming..part of this war is the way men are being demonized. I have made a point of stopping to comment on any male-bashing writing I may run into on the various platforms I pop in on..

The duck tape and crazy glue had me howling again.

You got this. ✊

Nonya

1 month ago

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