Flying in Chains

Suit, tie.

You come home.

Me in my brand-new cherry underwear set.

"Put this on."

I obey, new collar that matches!

You attach my cuffs, behind my back.

"Bend."

I do, my glutes trembling in anticipation, waiting for that

*Slap*

*Rub*

*Smack* you know I like.

My panties grow damp. My bottom grows warm. My body yearns.

"Do you want me to stop?" You caress where you last spanked me.

"H-harder, Sir."

I'm almost...There! My knees tremble. I yell out my pleasure.

Orgasm dripping down my thighs.

"My fat little pet was horny, yes?"

"Y-yes, sir."

"Come here."

You sit in my red recliner, that I got for you, comfortable, suede.

"Unzip me."

I walk on my knees, hands still locked. I grip your zipper between my teeth.

You pull your member out, ready, waiting.

I open my mouth, I lick-

*Bzzzzzt*

Darn, time for work.

Another dream deferred!

"Please, coffee," you said. 

Not at all like my dream.

Do you want it?

Are you hungry?

I'll give it you.

I'll feed you.

No need for...that thing collecting dust in our spare bedroom.

If you just want to fulfill your needs

Use me.

Are you frustrated?

Use me.

Are you sad?
Come to me.

Bored?

I'll tease you.

Let me be your wife.

Your servant.

Your brat.

I'm here. 

Waiting.

The hunger I have for you, my love,

Didn't match yours tonight.

Vanilla didn't do it

So my imaginings added to it.

Your sweet caresses were pinches and pulling

Your rubbing was hearty slaps across my ample bottom.

When you were done,

My Satisfyer forced me to cum.

Today, another year.

Steak, cake, gifts and hugs.

38...another trip around the sun.

I look back with memories

And look forward with hope.

My wishes are a trip and a whip😉

I confess

I fantasized tonight.

While you rocked my body

I imagined I was tied down

My hands clasped together above my head

Pretend satin blindfolds kept my eyes closed

Ghostly gag kept me muffled.

That made me yell

With clenched teeth

Only when you said

Let it out

Was I able to.

It's a mess

Full of love

Full of longing

Dark with need

Want to serve you

Want to be punished

You're so sweet, so kind, so loving

So vanilla

It aches

Hard night

Dreams of anger and hate haunted me

A woman, grown

Can still be hurt

Two decades of evil to unravel.

I met you, still wrapped in pain

Taking care of your needs

Your pain

Neglecting mine

I'm so glad you're doing well

Still I wake

In tears

Rejection from  24 years ago

And abuse from 4 years ago

Color my nightmares

Bondage and discipline

Are therapy

But you're too scared to see it

You don't want to hurt me,

You told me last night

Because I've already been hurt

What you don't truly understand

Is by my consent

You'd set me free

I could sneak

If I wanted

I don't.

Being paranoid at the wrong people

Makes it easy

to cheat.

A million ways to do what I desire

But my heart and brain don't always match

This I know.

I have people who would fulfill my lust

People you don't know

People who don't care...

I'm not your enemy's type.

Just because they are a Dom

and I am a sub

Doesn't equal two.

My love,

I need what you won't give me.

Looking at the cuffs, the crop, the restraints in plain sight in our bedroom at night

Breaks my heart

Hurts my spirit

I feel lied to

I feel betrayed

I feel cheated.

"Once a year" will never be enough.

I can't walk away

But sometimes your gentleness hurts more than ropes ever could.

Into my fantasies I go

Into my dreams

After our sweet, romantic sessions

I dream of control

You love me

You respect me too much to hurt me

I know

But I escape into a world

Of velvet, ropes

Sexual fires

I know what you said

I won't make you

But I can dream

All I shared with you

Nothing changes

"I get it!" With hand up

To hush me.

All your public teasing

You don't follow through.

All my directions and gentle guidance

Frustrate you

Make you mad

You take me

But you don't control me.

How many times?

How many ways to say?

How many days

Until I get what *I* want?