My love hate relationship with corsets

PlutoOrange - Think of this as an addiction. It is a hell. Try to recreate yourself to become someone entirely new. Investigate what do you love in life, what are your inner supports, and keep investing your time into new you. Some new work or hobby project would be very in time now, do not leave yourself alone with these painful thoughts, keep doing something.

Elusive Vixen - Yes it hurts terribly. But what will happen if you go back?? In my experience it will get worse. I sat alone all day for days in the dark. Slept all the time. He didn’t even acknowledge this was not normal. You are strong and deserve a man who is going to treat you like you should be treated. I’ve had these exact same feelings and went back- it’s not worth it!! I’m so much better now that I have finally decided to block and no contact. You have to remember the times he hurt you. Don’t dwell on the good, it only makes it that much harder. Mine told me he didn’t give a fuck and I never loved him. That’s what I remember and I cut ties. You will want to stay in bed all day. You will cry. You will blame yourself. You will go through the what ifs. It’s the most difficult thing you will ever do. But when you get through to the other side, you will have peace in your decision. You’ll still hurt but you’ll look forward to the future again instead of wanting to die.

Look up trauma bond-that is what you are going through. It’s worse than an addiction.

The Kinky Poet​(other male) - I hope everything goes right for you
BE STRONG BE BEAUTIFUL AND BE YOU
Love and light T.K.P x

Elusive Vixen - I still have bad days but I’m crying less and they are fewer and fewer between.

Sweetlydepraved​(masochist female){I Guess } - I would recommend seeing a therapist or counselor specifically for motivational interviewing.

ScotChasSub​(sub male) - Coming up for a year ago now I went through the same thing. My narcissist ex broke things off with me and cut contact a week before our anniversary (I'd gotten us a fancy hotel room and booked a nice meal for us) and it was the most painful experience. I thought I'd never recover from it, and at the time didn't even consider him to be one.

What makes the end of a relationship with a narcissist so difficult is that for the duration of the time you were with them they manipulate you into believing that they are your everything. Everything else outside of their relationship with you doesn't matter in their eyes, and they make that notion the norm for you. The moment that connection is broken off you're almost starting over. The fake support they provided is gone, and all the relationships they made you distance yourself from so you can please only them makes you feel so alone. You long for that support they gave you, and they won't give it back.

It is going to be tough, and a year on I'm still struggling with it. I know deep down that he was toxic, manipulative and abusive but part of me (and part of a lot of us who have gone through this) will still hold a candle for these people. You might find at some point they'll contact you again, mainly because they think they can feed off of your love for them once more, but don't engage with them.

As Sweetlydepraved suggested, therapy is a good idea. That's the path I took, and it really helps you realise all of their toxic behaviours - no matter how minute. An outside voice of reason, one without bias, is your best port of call in this situation. At the same time, look out for you. Cry when you need to, take time for you and spend time with friends or family to slowly build back up any lost relationships.

At the core of it you were in an abusive relationship, but you've got this. I promise you that.