Master and the Sub

Ever since I was kid I was always a lucky person, used to find money, win contest, little things nothing ever big but it seemed I had luck. Hell I've been to death's door step a few times, a few friends here know one of those stories. I wonder when I ever do stand at his doorstep if he will not answer the door leaving me to walk in limbo alone. Since 2007 it seems if I didn't have bad luck I wouldn't  have any at all. Don't misunderstand I'm an optimistic person but on the days darkness stands over me like a tree blocking out the sun. telling me I should just quit looking for that one person that would make my soul happy It's  hard to walk into the sunlight to get him off my back. I see all the people I know living happy lives, people that have crushed my dreams of happiness living well and I feel I'll be walking though this hell  never finding the exit. Is it true oh be patient the one will come or am I just grasping for an illusion. As my time goes by and since the fountain of youth or time machines are a dream, I wonder if he is right and I will walk through this life always wondering what love is. As I look in the mirror I say smile for tomorrow is another day to hope.