Dancing in darkness and solitude

K y i v - One cannot see the light if not for the dark.

Grey Eyes​(sub female){Owned} - You have always been a ray of light with me little one. It will happen. You will find the one who lights your fire and cares for you, one who sees you for the caring, unique, wonderous woman that you are.

Tarotable - It isn't you. Our response to others relates to ourselves more than to the other person. We are all mirrors. If she is seeing darkness in you, it is because your mirror is reflecting the darkness in her. The same for anyone else. Now, seeing darkness is one thing, then people who keep their distance or disappear-- well those are different situations. Intention has a lot to do with it. Especially in communities like this. There are so many reasons why someone would move on or fade away, and all of those reasons 99% of the time have NOTHING to do with us (you). They could be going through shit. We all take a break from time to time (self-care). We can hope it is introspection, and if the person comes back, they come back better. I feel like I have come back better. Other reasons could be deeply personal and related to their vanilla life. I think the most important thing to realize is that it is usually not at all about us. A friend of mine taught me that lesson. He said, "anytime you ask yourself what you have done to me to pull away, I want you to tell yourself 'it is him not me'," that was the greatest gift anyone has ever given me because I tortured myself with worry. He was going through his shit. I had to give him space for that. He still does. What I realized is that I do too. I have times when I need to pull away. It isn't personal. In our (his and mine) case, it is the introvert in us. Then there are some who are just....well...not intended for us, and it is good that they go away. Trust the Universe to bring things and people into your life when you need them most. I am glad you're here. I've been away, but back. New me. New name. Hope you're doing well. --formerly SSG

Little moon​(sub female){Not lookin} - I keep reminding myself it’s not always about me, and that does hold true for many reasons and situations.
And in some of the cases where it is about me it’s not for me (not my place) to “fix” things or make them work. I think the hardest pill for me to take right now is that both sides need to bring things to the table and it can’t always come from me. Sometimes the urge and need for that elusive connection makes me forget that and the “me” takes a backseat in pursuit of that.
Very glad you’re back and better 🐾🌷❤️ I am glad you’re here too and the stuffies send their love 🤗

Tarotable - Yes. The other person has to be ready to come to the table. Sometimes, you have to be direct about that with a timeline. Or if you dont care about how long it will take, offer for them to take their time and let you know when they're ready to address it. But don't wait. You go on with your life. If they grow enough to be in line with you, then great. If not, then you won't be stunted by their level of development. And be proud of yourself for being strong enough to choose you. You should always choose you when others are not. ALWAYS.