We spent 3 full days and 4 nights together. We cooked together, we went and ate together, we pushed limits together, we watched movies together, we went to sleep curled up together. I got to look at his handsome face for a long weekend. I got to hold his hand and massage his back. I got to kiss him so much my lips dried out. I’m sore in every orifice, my lip is split, my throat is sore, I have bite bruises, and… I have my collar. I have, everything. I’m overflowing with gratitude and Thanks for everything he did to treat me so good this weekend and every time I’m with him. He is an amazing gift. The bite bruise on my ass turns me on as I sit down, I was eating a pickle today and smiled, because my lip stung, and I instantly readied at the sensation. I am his, he can make me feel like nothing is wrong with me, like I am perfect, when I know what a mess I am lol. I can’t begin to understand how it all happened so fast, but he has my heart. He has all of me. We are both very sexual people, and we both know that my heart is attached to my vagina lol. Daddy knows how much I love him, though I worry about him thinking I only love him for his skills. When I run my hand through that ginger beard, and look into those green eyes nothing else matters. I get lost in him, when no one else has ever made me so calm. I don’t worry when I am with him. From the big decisions to the itty bitty ones, I let him handle it. I love watching Daddy handle things, he handles them with such confidence. Hes so so strong, physically, mentally, sexually, confidently, emotionally. I feel so safe, and I have felt that way from the moment I walked in that hotel room, not knowing him from anyone, and I don’t trust people at all. He was different though. Daddy has always been different and as I told him over the weekend I cant describe it, even with an extensive vocabulary. There isn’t a word. Intensity isn’t it, love isn’t strong enough, primal, isn’t right, warrior isn’t right, there isn’t a word for whats in his eyes when Im looking in them. He is a hero for what he has been through in his life. He is a hero for ALL that he has accomplished, a hero for the tiny humans he is raising, a hero for the respect he shows to others, and my favorite reason that he is my hero, is that after being in a very dark place for many years, he pulled me out. He doesn’t even think of himself as a hero, he doesn’t talk much about things, he doesn’t even realize how much he has done to fulfill so much of me. Im so proud to be on his arm, so proud to wear his jewelry. In this life its his collar, but in this vanilla life, my professional life, he knows me so well to know that I couldn’t wear something “dark” out, so he bought me a gorgeous chain, a gorgeous symbol of how bright and infinite our bond, our love is.
I can wear it always, at work, at home, and know that I am his. That he wants me, and that Im cherished, ALMOST as much as I cherish him.
