Scribbles

I was talking to my friend about Long Distance BDSM Relationships and some of the inherent difficulties with them. My opinion was that no matter how much you like the person on the other end, no matter how much you trust them, or how much you both want it, there are just some things that cannot overcome distance. If all of us here, right now, got together we could make a list of a whole bunch of them. This is not a new concept or conversation.

Imagine you are a DD and your sub/little is several states away. You necessarily have a phone or cam or text-based relationship. Keep in mind that this is hypothetical so just go with me:

As a Dom you tell her, "You have been a bad girl. "She says, "Daddy, I deserve to be punished. Please spank me?"

Then this conversation ensues:

Daddy: Yes, you have been very, very bad. I will spank you. By text."
little: "Thank you Daddy. When I receive your text I will consider myself to have been spanked."
Daddy: "Yes, I am now spank texting you."
little "spank-texting?"
Daddy: "Um... Yes, or as I like to call it, Spanxting."

I started patting myself on the back, congratulating myself for being so clever. Thinking, Wow! By combining 2 fun words into one (like Bennifer, showmance, motel, spork, or funishment) in this case spanking and texting, I created a new portmanteau for the world of BDSM - "spanxting."
So I looked it up and much to my excitement Google was unable to find any such word!

Did I really just invent that???

Anyone???

I was digging through some old writings and I came across this one. I am not certain if I ever posted it here, and I don't recall the reason why I wrote it in the first place. As always, I don't expect everyone to agree with me but I think it makes for an interesting perspective on something that we all insist we dislike in others: being judgmental.

The thing is...

Being non-judgemental is overrated. It's also potentially harmful. The problem is not in being judgmental but in being an asshole because of it.
Imagine this general, unfortunately common scenario:
A person of a particular race or ethnicity is walking up the street toward you. You think:
"Oh no! This person is a stereotype, this person has a bomb, this person is going to explode me, oh no!" (lights own hair on fire.)
You have judged the situation - rightly or wrongly - as well as the person, and the perceived danger to yourself.
But does it matter?
Because now you must make an affirmative decision to continue on your current path, take another path, or stop and do nothing. It is this decision and action that makes you an asshole, or not.
I'm a fan of analogies so forget the heavy bigotry stuff and enjoy this instead:
You are standing on a street corner. You look both ways and think:
"Oh no! This street has traffic, this traffic has lots of cars, the cars are going to run me over, oh no!" (lights own hair on fire.)
You have judged the traffic - rightly or wrongly - to be such that trying to cross the street would be hazardous.
But does it matter?
So far all you have done is make a judgement, but still you must make an affirmative decision about what to do. Here are some questions to ask yourself:
Do I walk across the street?
Do I run?
Do I try to avoid the traffic myself?
Do I assume the traffic will avoid me?
Do I try some combination of these?
Do I just stand here and not cross the street at all?
Once again it is your decision that informs your action which in this case may or may not get you dead.
So what do you decide to do?: walk, run, spin, whirl, dance, sing, finger, moan, cum, have a headache, whatever. You might stick your thumb up your ass and just stand there. You might step off the curb and go for it. You might just make it across safely. You might get run over. You might die from your injuries. You might not.
You make a judgement. Next you make a decision based on it. Then you take action based on that, even if that action is to do nothing.
So judge away! It just may save your life someday. But keep in mind - your judgement may be sound but if your decision is stupid and your actions are stupid and you get run over by a stupid car which culminates in your stupid death, it doesn't mean all cars are bad.
Thinking and acting like it does makes you an asshole.

I have heard from many women here who are of the opinion that a man with a username that seems to refer to a body part, or who sends unsolicited dick pics, must be overcompensating for some perceived shortcoming. They have suggested that the exact opposite of what the username might indicate is actually the truth, and I can imagine how sometimes that might be. I have been asked by some of those same women if that is the origin of my UN; been accused of doing the same thing. But I am not compensating in any way for anything. My name has nothing whatsoever to do with my cock. In fact, it wasn’t even my idea.

So instead of having to explain this every time I’m asked, in hope of limiting the questions and accusations I have decided that for the first time, here, publicly, never before on this stage or any other anywhere in the known universe, I will tell my story. It is simple, kinda funny, and depending on who you ask, terribly clever. It began like this, many years ago...

I was talking to a friend about how since I was recently single, I wanted to find someone to have some fun with. He said that he had a female friend in a similar situation and that’s when he came up with an idea about getting us together as regular fuckbuddies in what he cleverly called a “Nothing Personal” relationship. Hardly an original idea but it was simple and worked for us: no phone numbers, addresses, work places, parts of town, personal emails, family information, social media, no other acquaintances other than our mutual friend who vouched for us, etc. Nothing Personal. Not even our names.

But we had to have some way to communicate; some way to address each other. So once again our friend in his infinite cleverness invented what he believed were suitably anonymous names. For purposes of conversation I became Johnathan Long and she was renamed Katherine Fresh (we had no idea at the time why he would give her such a less common surname than mine but more on that in a sec.) He then shortened our first names to John and Kathy, then again to a more casual Johnny and Kitty (no doubt becoming more and more excited as we approached the denouement of his clever little scheme.)

Needing a means to contact one another we chose a minor messaging program, then all that remained were emails in order to sign up. Once again, clever little fuck that he was, our mutual friend used our pseudonyms to invent email addresses in order to open accounts and use the chat: LongestJohnny@whatever.com, and FreshestKitty@whatever.com.

Let’s all take a moment to collectively wince at how fucking cheesy that was.

But that’s how it all began. Eventually my association with this woman ended and I have neither seen nor heard from her since. Our mutual friend never divulged any info, at least not to me.

A couple years later I decided to join a BDSM site. I still had the email address and since I needed a suitably anonymous name again why not use it? When I tried to sign up it turned out that someone was already using Longest (!) so I had to change it to Longer, arriving at the UN I use now. I have used this UN and email account on a total of 4 BDSM sites since then, including here.

That’s the whole story. So you see, my UN is only anecdotally associated with my cock, I have never sent a dick pic to anyone who did not explicitly request one, and other than the handful of people here that have actually seen my cock (in pics, vids, on cam or in person) it has not made an appearance – even in my username!

today,

all explorers can only abandon the road and watch as their common destination is sooner reached by a much faster man,

all players can only surrender the quest and marvel as their desired prize is proudly claimed by a more deserving winner,

all actors can only bow and exit the stage as their final curtain is drawn by a better qualified director,

all contestors can only tire and abandon the race as they fall too far behind an inexhaustible runner,

and today,
all the heavens can only mourn as they lose their best angel to a much higher calling.

(12/08/2019)

A few weeks ago I responded to a person about being so hooked on someone that you just cant put them down and walk away. This person described it as an addiction. I agreed and thought to share my reply.

Addiction to someone. Yeah. Been there.

It hurts so bad to not see them. It may hurt even worse to see them but still not hear from them. You try to convince yourself that it would be easier to just block the person, so at least you can tell yourself that the silence is your doing, not theirs. You wonder - were they actually trying to contact you the whole time they were blocked, If only you hadn't... Like a phone call you fear you missed every time you checked the phone just to make sure it was working so that you wouldn't miss their call. Because of the distance apart there is no door that you can just knock on; no doorbell that you could just ring. No body in front of you. No face to look at. No eyes to drown in. And perhaps the hardest part: Do they still want me? Do they even remember me? I can't move on but maybe they already did?

So you wait and hope. There is always hope.

Hope is the worst part. Hope is all that's left.

Addiction to someone. Yeah. Been there.

(11/15/2019)

Dearly beloved, we are gathered here today to give spanks to (insert spankees name/names here) and to reflect on all the many people and things to be spankful for.

I'd like to take this opportunity to spank all the wonderful weirdos that have tolerated me here, and sort of eyeroll all the people in my lesser-flavored life.

You know, as we stand here, glasses raised, spanking eachother for another year of whatever nonsense weve gotten up to I am heartwarmed to be surrounded by so many spankful people.

If somehow I have not spanked you personally please know that in my heart I spank each of you everyday.

Spank you very very kindly,

-me

That people may not believe in one another, or indeed themselves, is not God's problem. That humankind created itself in it's own image using the notion of divinity incarnate as a template is not God's problem. That the unclean, the fearful, the ugly, the sorrowful, and the inept esteem themselves only by invocations of their own composition is not God's problem.

God was invented by mortals so that they among us who misstep may not fall; was invented so that the disheartened may have a reward to anticipate and believe in; was invented so that the sinful may unburden themselves of responsibility for all crimes of frailty, stupidity, ignorance, or hatred; was invented so that the weak of mind, the miserly of love, the shallow of soul, and vacant of spirit may be cleansed, absolved, and received in His name - none of which is God's problem.

God's problem is that no one else realizes that.

(orig post 08/22/19)

Just because you are looking back doesn't necessarily mean that you are actually going back. Sometimes what's back there is just really good to look at.

Poly. Yeah, that's one I can't quite get my head around. Yet.
I'm curious about it, though not necessarily in trying it. Possibly, but unlikely,

Maybe...

ok, we've all had threesome and foursomes and thensomes and moresomes, but I can be somewhat territorial. Also, while outwardly I may seem all cool and into it, wearing a cape emblazoned with the name Superhard! written in one of the sexier fonts - within my wee, fragile heart there are different battles being waged:

"Is she more into him than me?"
"Why did they suddenly stop spanking as soon as I got into bed?"
"Does this condom not compliment my skin tone?"
"Could his cock really be that much bigger than mine, his cum taste that much better than mine, his morning breath be that less offensive than mine - could it??"

Might be that I could have similar concerns in any of the aforementioned -somes. But, by definition, never in a monogamous relationship.

Plus I'm stingy and I dont like spending hours in line for a 37 second ride and no one likes secondhand pussy and fine I'll just take my toys and go home!
I'm cool with the idea. I know people who are into it. I dont think any less of them (or more) than I would have otherwise. Live and let fuck, that's my philosophy.

So, maybe, someday, under the right circumstances, could happen, I'll consider it, but I'm thinking probably no.

Unless...

(orig post 8/19/19)

It is a comfort to know that there is a place where a group of like-minded people with similar interests can gather to discuss all the different reasons and ways that people fuck.

Fetishes. That's why were here. Instead of getting high on the fumes of your own self-important bullshit keep in mind that my kinks are no better or worse than yours, and vice versa. So...

To all the dickless pussies who read my profile and feel obligated to tell your lady friend that you think I'm too much of a meanie for her - try giving her credit for being able to make up her own fucking mind! Then maybe we will allow you and your jealousy to sit quietly and obediently on the floor and watch as I fuck her in the ass. I'll even let you look me right in the eyes while you jerk off, assuming you can still even get it up.

To the stupid whore who was afraid to admit that she wanted to fuck me because her friends thought that I was too "toxic" (whatever that means) - stop sharing my fucking profile with them! Think about me, grab your nipples, make sure they are good and hard, twist, get wet, and fingerbang the shit out of yourself. And if your friends insist on acting like freshly-minted pubescent twats having pillow fights and talking shit about what a meanie I am then you can tell them to climb down off their wet rags and fuck off.

To the rim-licking, testost-o-fuck who read only enough of my profile to conclude that I was a stupid awful meanie yet was unable to hurl a more debilitating insult than "you probably have a tiny cock" I have this to say:

Maybe my cock is tiny
Maybe my cock is not tiny
Wait - why are you thinking about the size of my cock?
Stop thinking about my cock!

To all the filthy skanks who believe that their gold-plated, diamond encrusted pussies are too shiny and perfect and special for a meanie like me - Clitoridectomy is a thing, look it up, file your teeth, bite til you get it right, mix it all together, and choke on the resulting bloody cunt pudding.

And to the rest of you - I'm very pleased to meet everyone! Let's talk, get familiar with each other, become friends, see what happens. If you are interested in me then it likely has at least something to do with what you recognized in my profile. That's awesome.
If you aren't interested in me then chances are pretty good that we weren't going to be compatible anyway. Also awesome.
But if you are going to judge me then judge ME and not the fabled evil meanie that is rumored to have been spotted in your own weak, ill-informed interpretation of my profile.

And in the meanie time fuck off.

(orig post 8/12/19)