A Recovering Pick-me

Title says it all folks! I wish I could be attracted to women. They already have it all...their beauty, their talent, their caring nature, attention to detail, quick-wittedness, charisma, their gorgeous bodies...I feel like a women would get me and understand me. We would be able to get each other emotionally. We could predict on another's moods and make sure to be there for each other if anything goes bad. I lived in a house with a lesbian couple. They were in charge of the house and I thought their relationship seemed pretty good as they worked in conjuction with each other. I thought they were an awesome couple!! I also have had women hit on me before. I think because of my short hair, some people have mistaken me for a lesbian. But these women's advances did not arouse me in any way. It didn't pique my curiosity. I did not really feel comfortable with women flirting with me and something told me this is not what I wanted. I've had men very smugly say to me when I was way younger that I have yet to experience a sexual encounter with a woman, almost like it was inevitable. And it may be so, but I can look at pictures of woman all night long, in erotic, BDSM scenarios, pornographic images and it won't do much for me. If anything, I just picture myself being in their place and imagining what exciting sexual encounters I would have with a man...or two! So, it goes back to the old question of nature vs. nature and I suppose it's in my nature to like men. So there it is. Gah!