Recently I’ve been finding myself having more and more urges to speed along this process.
I’ve been hunting for a Dom for what seems like the better half of this year. I’ve also been taking efforts to have more discipline with myself in this process.
More often than not, I’m approached by pseudo Dom/mes or people who just want to fuck, passing off their rough vanilla tendencies as kink exploration. I find myself becoming frustrated and a bit hopeless.
I have been reinforcing my patience with avid yoga and mindfulness. Mindfulness of how I carry myself:general upkeep, self care, style of clothes, career, and health. I’m more intentional when I speak or engage in any activity or with any person. It is refreshing. I’ve come to realize although much easier and less taxing to my mentality to have someone lead me in these areas as well as other aspects of life, I’m more than capable. There’s something satisfying about that.
Although I am becoming restless, these increasing urges have been tamed a little while longer yet. The current tamer: vinyasa flows and trying new foods!