I know that some of you may have clicked this blog because you know it's me and my blogs can go really funny, dark or somewhere so far out in left field, the ball left the park.
Today we're going to talk about playing with poop! Yup, get out the gloves because we're taking the plunge! Pushing through the sphincter and straight the mud pies! We're not going to waste time on gophers peeking out their hole, or playing wack a mole with the dark star, nope! We are full bore fisting like Mario before he met Donkey Kong.
Now before we get started *snaps gloves on* let me forewarn ya... I don't like being anal about the topic, nor do I want to come off as being shitty in the conversation so I'll try to keep my crowning to a minimum.
Some of y'all need professional help. Imodium AD and Pepto Bismol are simply not strong enough to deal with all the fishy smelling coca cola spewing from your tight lipped john. I've spoke with some who think the screen door shits are perfectly normal, and I'm here to tell you, put down the milk, ya lactose intolerant soy boy. Know when curry is lava fonting like Mt Vesuvius from your fleshy volcano that Curry... Isn't for you! Reality is, you want your ass dry fisted like a steam engine running down hill but your lil shitter can't handle a well lubed pinky. Don't let your fantasy fuck up someone else's reality. The greedy self serving plunger busters, clogging up the public commode, has to stop! Be real. Understand what your ass can take. Sometimes poor choices leave your butthole looking like an aardvark... Own up to it. Live in the reality that you're going to be stuck in Depends for most of your life and leave those who don't want to deal with your shit, alone. Be honest about your screen door shits, when approached. Coprophilia has a limited participation pool, but I promise you, I'm not the septic tank for your backyard.
*Grunts and strains* Aaaaaahh... Now don't we all feel better about cleaning the air, removing the Cleveland steamer and washing away the dirty Sanchez??
I know I do.
Max