I keep getting guys who have no ambition on their own. THIS WHAT I DO NOT WANT. (A submissive is NOT someone who ONLY relies on the Domme for everything. I will NOT tell you to pee or take a dump, your body does that. I do NOT want a submissive as a puppet or a scarecrow (all I want is a brain). I’ve had a submissive before with his own thoughts, IT CAN HAPPEN AGAIN!)
I want a guy with his own hopes and dreams. . . (NOT someone who relies on mine.)
I want to be able to support each other with our own dreams. (If you want to go sky diving, make your own cook book, rock climbing, make your own video game, collect action figures, travel, go to a com-a-con in each state etc Then please tell me. )
I played video games, RPG, watched Anime, and painted with my ex.
To be honest, if the only things you want to do is “please” or make your future domme “happy.” Do NOT seek me. I’ve learned the only person who can make me happy is ME. (The happiest time I honestly had was, when I was with my submissive ex, was the four hours in which I wrote my novel. Dominance and control are more a need to calm my anxiety.) I need support, not happiness.
I need someone who lets me control the budget, menu, and activities (micromanaging) . . . I want him to believe that I am controlling the household in the benefit of both of us. I am more practical than anyone I know with money and most food. I want to exercise together and compete (with bets and such like if my submissive boyfriend wins, we did to do his favorite activity, if I win I get massages or he makes my favorite meal etc.)
I need someone into me, not my domiance. It's a huge part of me, but it is NOT all of me.
Many say I just want to control a vanilla relationship, but to be honest, I want somewhere between a FLR and vanilla date life (as I am NOT keen on letting the public know I am dominant as I have gotten called B*tch, babysitter, and other unkind and mean names for simply wanting control. The name calling, the fake friends, the gossip really kill my confidence even as a dominant. I feel it usually done by those who do NOT understand and they are afraid to ask questions.
FLR needs to be agreed on both sides and the levels needs to be discussed. There is a very helpful scene in both book and movie “Fifty Shades of Grey” in which he gave her contract in which there was a list of kinks and fetishes in which she could ask about and agree or disagree to. Communication is a huge thing for me. If a submissive just says whatever the dominant wants, and has no opinion of his own, then please seek someone else because you are a puppet.
I need a guy who knows what he wants (which is me in the mix of things) and wants to control the household things. . . He can do chores, errands, help me and support me to earn fun time, release, and special time, allowance etc.
In other blog, I will explain what is would be like living together.
I keep getting guys what can I do for you. . . get to know me and see if you like me (and let me get to know to see if I like you too) and then we'll work on the dominance.