Thoughts on Lessening Shark Attacks

Thoughts on Lessening Shark Attacks

CapnRick​(dom male) • Nov 19, 2019

Nearly every sub I have talked to has related the same experience in the first few hours/days in The Cage... Schools of rapacious sharks, crude and rude come-ons hitting on a newbie from every direction. We all know it happens, maybe even getting worse.
I'm wondering if between us and the staff, some sort of algorithm might be put in place to begin weeding out the worst of the predators..

As a start, might the staff keep tabs of how many times each member is "blocked" ? If even just the one single Cager with the most "blocks" against him/her was 'invited to leave" each week, there would be 50 fewer outright boorish predators here in a year...
Culling just one heavily blocked Cager at a time would in no way threaten the great majority of us, who maybe accumulate a blocking now and then. Only those who are heavily blocked--blocked by multiple members over multiple bad behaviors-- would even be at risk of being stripped of their membership.

Something along these lines, publicized, might even act as a deterrent to others waiting to pounce in the shark tank. Also, maybe the Number 2 blocked shark might receive a caution against bad behavior here?

There are surely more people here who have either experienced this problem, or tried to gentle down some of those wounded in their early going, who might have better ideas than this -- I just hope to get the ball rolling toward ANYTHING which can reduce the wounding of our newbies.

MasterBear​(other butch) • Nov 19, 2019

I think it is important for newbies to learn how to negotiate dark waters.

Is it unfortunate? Yes, but its also part of life- vanilla and other.

Newbies learning how to stand up, speak out, recognize and act on abusive behaviors, and move strongly and independently within BDSM walls are skills that are invaluable and life long.



Also- just a side note.

I am assuming you are talking about young , female, submissive newbies. ( of which I could be very wrong.)

I think that we should look at newbie couples, submissive males, single males as needing just as much welcome and help.


Perhaps-- if we work on cultivating positive behaviors in new D types from the start we would have less of an issue.

Bunnie • Nov 19, 2019

Dammit... I thought this was gonna be about Sharks lol.... ocean ones.

Although... perhaps you’re onto something. How do we navigate the waters where there are actual sharks?

Let’s look at this place as a dive centre...

When someone first arrives, they’re given instruction/s by the owner/employees of the centre... so perhaps there could be a simple note that pops up or an email sent to every new member who joins, giving them some guidelines (beyond site rules) of how to navigate a little bit.
Perhaps sharing some options they will be unaware of when first arriving... like being able to lock off all their messaging systems... and perhaps explaining how that can work... even suggesting that as an option until they’ve had the chance to look around and see what it’s all about.
It could include an outline of the different things available, and changes that have been made to the site. Kind of like a mini guided tour.

I guess what I’m saying is... a bit of an introduction/instruction manual from the only people they know aren’t coming at them with an ulterior motive (apart from wanting them to stay).

I don’t actually know anything about dive centres lol, so if anyone else can continue on from what would occur from the intro, please do

Zedland​(dom male) • Nov 20, 2019

The only problem I see is the more you try and crack down on the sharks the more likely you are to kill a bunch of tuna in the process.

And if you made it through that metaphor...I understand the desire to protect others. There is something uniquely satisfying about "cracking an offender over the head" but it is rarely an effective long-term solution. It is far better to equip people to deal with these issues themselves. That way when they run into a shark they are capable of dealing with it themselves by treating the sharks like spam.

CapnRick​(dom male) • Nov 20, 2019

Yes, Master Bear--I've only dealt with the female variety of submissives, and not overly young ones either. Of course I didn't mean to exclude or ignore your variation of submissives, but I have first-hand knowledge of their experiences to go on. And both Bunnie and Z are onto something with an instructional note on the early going in the shark tank. I'm all for that, but gaffing a few sharks out of the pool still appeals to me as a helpful idea, though clearly less so to you both. Culling a shark or two doesn't really seem likely to do in any tuna (do we have any tuna in here?!)

Appreciate your views, all three.

Zedland​(dom male) • Nov 20, 2019

Well the main objection, if it can be called an objection at all, I have (aside for a general libertarian distaste for crackdowns and the resulting economic depression in Spanish fishing villages) to culling the sharks is the effectiveness.

If you could properly identify the worst violators and ban them...then so what? At best you have delayed the predator the several minutes it would take him to generate a new account and at worst the feeding frenzy will hardly notices a few casualties. Increasing the "lethality" of such measures increases the likelihood that the innocent will be caught up with the guilty.

It is not that I disagree with your goal, I in fact applaud your initiative, but rather I feel there will always be sharks. Just as there will always be criminals. Providing the tools and know how to deal with that inevitably strikes me personally as the better option.

Also the tuna thing. I needed a game fish and apparently them and sharks are descended from the same distant ancestor. Fun fact of the day.

OwnedByTheOcean​(masochist female) • Nov 20, 2019

I adore you Captain for trying to protect the sub. Above all protect the sub from anything and everything including herself. The waters are certainly shark infested, and thankfully , so many such as yourself, are willing to make their presence known- a shark deterrent , so to speak. But more importantly, wise, kind, and true doms not only speak out on our behalf, giving us a voice when we sometimes cannot find the words; but doms such as yourself have given us confidence- confidence to draw that line in the sand and remember what we are worth. That is more valuable that you can ever know. I am grateful for the goods ones, the gemstones, like you, the reasons we as subs continue to swim in these waters. Thank you for being a lover of all subs, a protector of us and givIng us a voice and self confidence. It matters.

RopeBunnie​(sub female){Not Lookin} • Nov 20, 2019

I am a newbie and find the metaphors interesting, but true! I did not know how to navigate these waters, but thankfully a few have reached out to help guide me, and I'm not feeling exposed and vulnerable! I like that you're looking out! I do, however, agree with Z... Wouldn't want the good ones caught up in the net with the bad... But, you got the conversation rolling, so that's a start!

Hisproclivity​(sub female) • Nov 20, 2019

Time and time again I see blogs and forum posts in regard's to "true" Dom's outing the "fake" one's (Captain please don't take offense). I get the inherent protective nature, but I have noted the more sub-on-sub interactions/communications the better. Once they have a support system they can bounce ideas off each other.

When I first joined---a vetted, amazing insta-Dom caller-outter was the actual source of predator-like tendencies; a "shark" if you will. Through several conversations with sub's I realized the damage he had done. We frequently see Dom's go on tangents about this behavior, but unfortunately predators will always exist. I have no control over being attacked walking to my car---but I can always walk when it's well lit, with a buddy, and pepper spray. Maybe some type of sub-Only group for newbies?