Information about Doms

K y i v • Jan 14, 2020

Erick...wet towels are a deal breaker.. Bye!

K y i v • Jan 14, 2020

@BuckeyeBabyGirl​

Please do not attribute anything in this lifestyle to be any different than Vanilla dating. Nothing is superior, the same precautions apply. You have to do your own work to sort them out.

References are unreliable at best. Just like vanilla friends may play them up to see you dating (Blind Date).

Any list will soon be corrupted by anger, or vengeance just like the vanilla sites.

You are 40 you know what to look for..... trust your gut and don't read anything superior into this lifestyle.

Like anything worthwhile it takes time, trust and repeatability to establish any relationship.

Dunimos​(dom male) • Jan 14, 2020

I also hear this Erick character once wrote a creepy response to a forum post.. somewhere... it freaked everyone out.... NOT COOL

Bunnie • Jan 14, 2020

There are plenty of people willing to share their *opinions* on people. There are also just plenty of gossips. How does one determine the difference between the two?

Be sure to ask what their *own personal* experiences with that person are... and then hey... why not ask that person about it? Honesty is what this is all about isn’t it?

I’ve been shat on by plenty of our bright stars here. Would I call any of them out as bad people? No. Most people just want to be liked, so they’ll go along with the group to fit in and have “friends.” They’ll believe those who have the shiniest opinion because that’s what we’ve been conditioned to do from our first experiences with authority. Add bullies and people pleasers to the mix, and it’s an interesting mish mash version of high school.

Learning to trust and listen to yourself is much riskier. Especially if you make mistakes, because there’s no one to blame. Learning to walk your own path is terrifying because we’ve always been told others know better. If that’s where your safety is, by all means... find the vine. Just be aware... opinions are *always* biased, based on someone’s life lens... which *doesn’t* match yours.

It’s also just simply lazy. Seriously... do your own work... put in your own effort and time. Do your research. Learn. Learn who you are. Learn what you offer. Then learn about what you’re looking for. Then put in the time and effort getting to know the people that catch your interest.

LordofPain56 • Jan 14, 2020

1) I'm sure there are several Doms on this site whose former partners are not members here. And they may no longer be in contact or know where they are.
2) Not ALL bdsmer's are "lifestylers". There are still some who lead private lives, they don't attend kink play parties, munches and conventions. I may tell stories of a past relationship, but I will never give out names or contact info, because if I did, they would be outed. That is an invasion of privacy if you ask me.
If anyone ever wanted to know how I interact with a partner, they could have just read about it in my profile (that portion and many other paragraphs deleted years ago), since I don't care anymore.
If someone contacted me asking what would life be like for her, I would send her the whole nine yards, but never any personal contact info or names.

alawey​(sub female){(OWNED BY } • Jan 15, 2020

@lords.. While i understand what you are saying . asking for ref. Is not outting someone . before you get said refe. you should always ask if they would mind talking to someone . and there are many other sites than here. That ppl are on that true names are hidden . or shit for that sake there is always kik accounts.with no real info. Just my two cents on that.
I know that one of my best friends lives miles and miles away from me. Buut she messaged me and introduced herself and let me know she was a former sub of my Wolf. We talked everyday with his approval . to the point to where when i was time to met him in person . she went shopping with me for new outfits and shoes vai Skype.

alawey​(sub female){(OWNED BY } • Jan 15, 2020

@ bunnie .
Gurl u are right . about learning yourself first. Its so important , if you dont know yourself or done your homework to say . then there is not point i think sometimes. Look at it like trying to drive for the first time and not knowing where to put the key or which pedal is which . ( ok i will amitt that might not make as much sense as it did in my head. Damn hamster...lol) .

Nope, shouldn't do it...

ThirtyFourPointFive • Jan 15, 2020

A "Registry" where people are encouraged to inform on each other? Perhaps even anonymously inform on each other? Sure. Sounds like a great idea. What could possibly go wrong with that?

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Damn Erick! I read about that stuff you did! How could you?

I completely agree with Erick. You are throwing lots of emotions around and things are going to said that are exaggerated and untrue.

I took a girl to a concert long long ago.
While there and against my advice, she purchased and ate her first hit of LSD. She was very soon a panicked and freaked out teen girl.
I had done acid many times before and took her fucked up ass home, put her under the covers of my bed and talked to her most of the night, helping her ride out the drug. I ended up sleeping outside the covers after she passed out.
I woke up the next morning to her kissing me, telling me what a gentleman I was, telling me how she couldn't believe I did not try have sex with her while she was fucked up. I took her home, we did not have sex.

I was a stupid shy 18 yr old kid with self confidence issues (Not a problem these days ) and managed to come up with a hundred reasons why I she wouldn't want me to call back and so I did not call her back.
It pissed her off so badly, that she told a whole group of girls that I had fed her LSD and raped her. It took me over a year to find out this had been said, the whole time wondering why those girls were acting so strange towards me. As far as I know, those women to this day still think that I had sex with that girl against her will. Now SHE knows and I know that what she said is not true but those women do not. I have went as far as trying to find her on social media to rain disdain on her ass but she is nowhere to be found.

Now, I know why she did it, I hurt her feelings. But it was because I was a backward ass kid, not because of anything I did wrong.

This may seem like an exaggeration of the subject at hand, but if you start writing stuff down, a similar something is bound to happen.
Always remember.. there are two sides to every story and some people will do anything to save face.

FunCouple{.-Couple-.} • Jan 15, 2020

Hello BBG
If it helps, feel free to put a (Good’un) tick next to my name.
Kitty regularly informs me she is so lucky, and I’m not one to disagree with a beautiful woman.
FC