Willingness to post profile pictures

Willingness to post profile pictures

Mindmelter​(dom male) • Feb 16, 2020

I’ve been using thecage for a few days now, and I want to add more profile pics to my account in order to add legitimacy to my profile page. Unfortunately I do feel rather self-conscious about this sort of thing. I worry I won’t appear “attractive” enough to the people I wish to meet. Was also considering wearing a mask in a photo, but I’m not sure how many people are super into doms doing that. Thoughts?

MasterBear​(other butch) • Feb 16, 2020

What I have found is that a confident Dom on is considered a sexier Dom.


I also look at it like this --'x Once you're in a relationship with somebody are you just going to continue to wear that mask? I mean eventually they're going to see you. So as far as I'm concerned get that out the way right out the gate.

Mindmelter​(dom male) • Feb 16, 2020

You’re definitely right that I need to build up my confidence. I’m still working to expand my comfort zone, but it’s kinda hard because, without getting too personal, the way I was raised caused me to be rather passive.

LordofPain56 • Feb 16, 2020

I'm not posting mine, never did.
It's not about confidence. It's about avoiding negative exposure. Suppose you work at a company of 100 employees and one of your co-workers sees your face photo in a BDSM website. I can already hear the gossip around the water cooler.
Grounds for getting fired? How bout if a friend of a friend of one of your relatives mentions that they saw your face photo on a BDSM website. What !
No thanx
Besides, you think all these profile photos are actually real photos of the person who is posting the profile. I would bet that maybe not more than 1 % of them are real.
I understand that maybe some people are going to be more responsive to a profile that has an attractive photo attached, and you do want more exposure (within the group). But if you read the profile text and decide to contact that person based upon the compatibility that you can gleem out of the text, you can always exchange photos PRIVATELY after trading enough e-mails and had determined that you actually want to see the person.

Mindmelter​(dom male) • Feb 16, 2020

I would NEVER post a picture of my face on here for pretty much the same reasons you gave. What you put online never truly goes away.

LordofPain56 • Feb 16, 2020

I wouldn't personally be opposed to having a full body shot (fully clothed of course) with you face blacked out and taken in a location in which you KNOW for sure that YOU cannot specifically be associated with that location. It would be for the purpose of showing at least what type of build you had, and maybe they could use it to confirm your height and build that you attest to in your profile text.
As to my comment about being fully clothed, that is my own personal preference, but all you exhibitionists may post as you wish, hehe.

MasterBear​(other butch) • Feb 16, 2020

There is a difference between not posting your pic because it's just not something you do AND not posting your pic because your to afraid or ashamed to.

In my opinion -- a lot of BDSM is about coming into your own. Challenging yourself. Pushing your own boundaries.
Post your pic and be PROUD!!!

There will always be people that think you are hideous. There will always be people who think you are stunning.

Dont let YOUR ASSUMPTION of how other people feel determine what you do.

LordofPain56 • Feb 16, 2020

True and I listed why I believe it would be un-wise to post a face pic, and I never said anything about anyone being afraid or ashamed of posting a photo based upon physical appearance.


You mean, you want everybody to "out" themselves? No thanx, my private life will be kept private. AND, why haven't you challenged yourself by posting your own face photo here???
No dis-respect here at all and not intending to be confrontational. But there's always two sides to everything.

theirlovedsub​(sub female) • Feb 16, 2020

I am pretty sure I have seen a dom on here with a photo of them in a mask. I don't see why you can't or wouldn't.

I can see why some people would want to keep their photos off here for personal reasons. After chatting for a bit I would wanna see your picture, though. So, hiding a picture simply because you may not be what someone else considers attractive doesn't make sense to me unless the relationship you're looking for is 100% words and voice. They would see you eventually.

CapnRick​(dom male) • Feb 16, 2020

"need to build up my confidence" ..... how you were raised made you be passive....general tone of fear and uncertainty in your posts.

Are you sure you belong on the 'D' side of the slash? Those are all things I might expect to hear from an uncertain potential male sub.