Why are men scared?

Dellydoodah​(neither female) • May 26, 2020

Maybe you just plum wore him out and he went to lie down for a week?

navesub​(sub male) • May 26, 2020

He was probably scared of the reality of his fantasies actually taking place.
Personally my eyes would light up...I would never run!

Azzabackam​(switch male){PawPawGirl} • May 26, 2020

There isn't really enough context here to make a definitive statement. If this is really all there is to it, then I'd say you don't know enough about this guy to deduce what happened to make him run. A lot of people here have proposed very likely scenarios for what could've happened, bu the best way to figure it out is to ask him.

Maybe years of social/religious conditioning kicked in and he freaked out over how "wrong" he's been taught this is.

Maybe it was his first scene and he got overwhelmed.

Maybe he's married/otherwise engaged, and suddenly realized his SO would wonder where he was, or had an attack of conscience for cheating.

Whatever it was, there's only one way to find out. Ask him.

tallslenderguy​(other male) • May 26, 2020

Wow, some wonderful and insightful input on this thread. i'm grateful for so many of you here. Lot's to consider and add to ones bank of understanding.

i'll come from a different angle. What you describe sounds to me like a 'hook-up.' Even though you texted for a couple of weeks, it doesn't sound like you actually met before your scenario?

i consider anything that involves physical connection arranged over the internet to be a hook up. At least, the first time with that person. i don't think i have ever met a person in person who was the same as i saw or imagined them while writing back and forth online. It's just different, for both parties i believe. The energy one feels in writing can be different than the energy one feels in person. How do you really know what he was feeling was "fear?" He could have been feeling so many things, as many posts on this thread suggest.

i'd suggest that if you want better results, that you do a vanilla meet as a first step? Coffee, tea, a walk in the park. If you click, that can be a sort of foreplay. my best physical connections have been with people i have been with more than once. Think about the first time you ever had sex? Was it all you dreamed of? my first time, i completely missed the vagina. Yep, didn't get in and didn't have a clue because, well, it was my first time and she had to tell me i hadn't quite hit the target. It definitely got better for all parties concerned after that, but it also involved feedback and listening.

DangerouslySafe​(sadist male) • May 31, 2020

It sounds like this has caused you some hurt and frustration. That is never fun to deal with but i think you have the right idea in searching for answers. Everyone has bad experiences and gaining understanding that helps you grow is best thing that comes from them.

Azzabackam​ and tallslenderguy​ both stated things that I agree with and hit on some of my first thoughts. It could be that he got scared but it could be a different emotion or logical thought that made him leave. I don't know enough about the situation to narrow down what I think might have triggered his response but I will say that two people talking about 1 topic can have very different definitions ,thoughts, emotions, etc on that topic or kink. Its important to define and understand kinks or activities so that any ambiguity is removed. It also it is very important to understand how someone's personality plays into that activity as it's been defined. There is a very big risk to spanking someone if expectations, desires and personalities are not understood. If your reaction was to cry because it hurt, which for you means "I really like this," and he expected extreme excitement, then that could make him panic or rethink the situation. It could be if you got super excited wanting more of a beating and his full idea of spanking was a few smacks on the ass then this too could cause him feel overwhelmed and to rethink the situation. Sometimes you can click with a partner very quickly where it seems you are just naturally on the same page but in my opinion this doesn't happen often and it is almost impossible to connect this way with text messages alone because body language and voice inflection say as much if not more than words alone. I would also suggest taking some time in a vanilla meet up as first meeting.

House Talion​(dom male) • Jun 9, 2020

Inexperience is easier to see irl. Anyone can talk about stuff, but being able to experience stuff with others requires experience and ability. Without either it wouldn't work or else he would need to acquire what hes lacking

Miss Anima​(dom female) • Jun 9, 2020

If you didnt vet him your asking for trouble. The least him being a cheating coward

Re: Why are men scared?

realfreakydad​(dom male){NO} • Jun 15, 2020

realfreakydad​(dom male){NO} • Jun 15, 2020

I can’t speak for other I am not scared I am very honest and can be trusted and will listen to what ladies have to say and then I will give my option if they want to hear it , once I give it some ladies dont want to hear that and are turn off by it! do you have any other questions for me?

LordofPain56 • Jun 16, 2020

Hmmm....I thought it was the other way around. The first time I had an adult playtime session with a sub (who knew I was going to spank her), shrieked when I opened the closet door and pulled out the heavy suede flogger with 28 inch long tails after I had spanked her. And that got me even hotter (no not the whip, it was the fact that she let out that little scream, but STILL submitted). Now that was a good sub!