How do people like to be approached?

SweetSirRendering​(sub female) • Aug 12, 2021

i make friends on this site by first getting to know people comfortable communicating interest in my friendship in the public comments and chat. i feel anyone worth knowing more intimately are also those that build friendships first, speak openly and directly, and know what they want. my mail and bond are always blocked to new contacts. i reach out when i decide a person has qualities i look for in a closer relationship which can lead to friendship rather than remaining simply acquaintances.

Sweet Ginger​(sub female){⚓ } • Aug 12, 2021

I like when someone contacts me about something I wrote in my profile or blog. This makes me feel like they took the time and interest to read it. I don't like messages that sound like they are sent out to everyone. I'm more intrigued by a message someone sends that is honest, upfront and sounds like they put even a little thought into it. Just be yourself! I like when someone contacts me tells me a little about themselves and what drew them to my profile.

Miki • Aug 12, 2021

I don't mind if someone messages me out of the blue. Yes my profile is "pre-emptively curt" but that's to save me the trouble of having to repeat that while I welcome all messages and I reply to all, when I see them, I don't want to go beyond just that.

People can ask me anything. There's no "right or wrong"-- If it's something a bit dicey I say so, as politely and considerately as possible.

Other than that, I'm far more "approachable" in a place like this than I am in the brick-and-mortar world.

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@ O. P. I'm often curious myself as to what people find all that swell about my profile. It's not particularly sweet and gooey. I like it when people just want to have conversation.

yourbootsownme​(sub male) • Aug 11, 2021

I like people to simply be up front and pleasant. What I especially DON'T like are messages asking questions already answered on my profile, demanding personal details without offering any of their own, and most especially the frequent "Are you ready to serve me in all ways and obey me in all things?"

CSI • Aug 11, 2021

Great question. I love people to ask about or point out something in either my profile or my blog that interested them and I love it when they tell me about themselves. If I am the one to reach out first, it is to send a compliment or tell them something I enjoyed about their profile/blog. I think my problem is that if there is no follow though, I don't chase after people. I won't sit there and wave a flag to be like "hey, person, me sending you more than one message means I am interested in you" and I have run out of fireworks and glitter to shoot off to those same people.

Anyhow, back to the topic at hand: I prefer talking about everyday stuff and seeing how we get along as everyday people. I am willing to talk about kinks on the surface just to see if they mesh, but not going to go into particulars (like how big of a dildo or penis I can handle or how much of a mess I can make) until I am convinced they will be around for more than a couple of weeks.

cherilynn​(sub female) • Aug 11, 2021

It means a lot to me if I can tell that the person I'm communicating with has taken the time to read my profile whether they are looking for friendship or something more.
I also need a picture at some point otherwise it becomes just words on a screen and I just can't connect.
Lastly, friendship comes first, kink comes last.
Oh yeah, I forgot to mention, if the person I'm communicating with expects me to sit all day with phone in hand just waiting for the next message so I can pounce on it, forget it. I have a life and I would hope the other person does as well.

Alternight​(switch male) • Aug 8, 2021

In a general sense, I want you to speak to me as a person first before a potential play partner. If you jump straight into it, whether you're a sub or a dom, we're probably not going to work out.

In other words, I prefer people to slow their roll a little bit. By all means, talk about profiles, similarities, kinks, and whatever else- thats the nature of the place. But if you jump straight into giving me an order or something like that, thats a major turn off.

House Talion​(dom male) • Aug 8, 2021

I like ppl to be upfront, courteous, and respectful.

gabriel kerry​(dom male) • Aug 8, 2021

I personally start very slow which tends to turn most off. Hi, enjoyed your profile. BORING. I keep the boring vanilla conversation only because I am looking for one in particular. That one will appreciate my approach. But it sure does tend to turn people off.

Cressida Clytie​(masochist female){Taken} • Aug 8, 2021

For me I really do not mind if the first message is long or short as long as it is not a generic message that He/She sends to everyone. My profile is pretty detailed so receiving a message that's stating our similarities would be nice. I also prefer to have a decent conversation first rather than talking sexual stuffs right away.