Brats

Re: Brats

LongerJohnny​(dom male) • Dec 8, 2021

And in the sprit of brevity I will add:
Some of us prefer A
Some of us prefer B
A and B are both awesome!
It's a personal choice.

Lady Char​(sub female) • Dec 8, 2021

I think it's misguided to draw a line in the sand and say "I don't like brats"/ "I'm not interested in Daddy Doms". We aren't bananas and apples. One brat is vastly different from another. We are all individuals and we're creating individual connections.

Labels are (to quote the overquoted film quote) more like guidelines anyway. If you decide you're not ever going to open that particular box, you may miss out.

I've played with several Doms who've told me they "don't like brats" and we've got talking and clicked, because my kind of bratting is palatable to them in a way others might not have been.

Defender​(dom male) • Dec 9, 2021

Yep, that ^ is exactly what we older men say to younger females, who say in their profile "no men over 40" .

How often does that work......?

SirsBabyDoll​(sub female){Pizza+☕} • Dec 9, 2021

Defender,

You profile says the following:

"but I am also protective towards all styles of submissive female."

Does that include Brats or just women who are viewed by the community as being "true submissives" I.E: masochists and slaves?

I ask because your question of "how often does that work" followed by the felt very dismissive of Char's statement about missed opportunities.

Spellbound Wytch{Mr. Parker} • Dec 9, 2021

This brat phenomenon is clearly one of the most polarizing of all "kinks". A dominant type gave the simplest of all explanations: "It's the dominant's prerogative to choose who to connect with." Once again the explanation is met with the rebuttal of "you're missing out!" followed by accusations of him being dismissive for not widening his own horizons. *sigh*

ButterfliesAndCuffs​(sub female) • Dec 9, 2021

Just trust people to know what type of partner they like. Don’t force yourself on others. It’s really that simple.

Spellbound Wytch{Mr. Parker} • Dec 9, 2021

The behavior running rampant on this thread serves as a prime example of why so many people find brats exhausting. I'm sure that's going to be seen as mean and dismissive when the intent is simply to point out what anyone but the brats themselves sees as obvious.

SirsBabyDoll​(sub female){Pizza+☕} • Dec 9, 2021

There are many people who view Brats as not true submissives. I wondered where he stood because the tone of his message felt (my feelings and they are valid as anybody else's) dismissive of the idea of even learning about brats (not by playing but by researching and talking to brats about how they view their kink).

I pointed out his profile statement to find out his view on the submissiveness of brats because if he does NOT consider them to be submissives, then his blanket statement about protecting "all" is false.

I am in agreement that everyone has a choice to play with whomever they choose....

But where does knowledge come in? Or is everyone running on assumptions:

Sadists just like to abuse women, that's why they "get off" on hitting them.

Masochists are all mentally unstable and allow anybody to hit them.

Slaves are all co-dependent and uneducated.

Daddy Doms are pedophiles who force adults to help them live out their sick desires for kids.

Brats top from the bottom and are not submissives.

*None* of the statements are true, but that's what people ASSUME when they first encounter those kinks.....UNTIL research is done to expand knowledge.

Spellbound Wytch{Mr. Parker} • Dec 9, 2021

Once more, I'll remind you that you're insisting that all dominants take the time out of their lives to *educate* themselves as to your particular flavor of kink regardless whether they have any interest in it or not. I've mentioned, before but will repeat myself, that this very circular argument is why the majority of people find brats so exhausting and demanding - and often not worth the added effort.

You repeatedly claim that "others" are judging you and your fellow brats and insinuating that you and your compatriots are somehow "less than" they are. I've seen no one suggest that. Not in this thread at least. What I've tried to do, and have seen many others try as well, is to lay it on the line that you sometimes just have to accept that not everyone is going to want to RESEARCH what makes you tick.

All relationships - kinky and vanilla - are time *and* effort intensive and some people simply choose to not pour another layer of sticky into their recipe. Not everyone has a fetish for analyzing their own behaviors or those of someone else. Not everyone wants to peel an onion when they can settle for pickles and mustard on their burger instead. I wouldn't presume to persuade someone to try a food dish they don't care for ... and so on and so on. Not everything someone else doesn't have an interest in translates as them belittling someone else. *exhausted once more*

Lady Char​(sub female) • Dec 9, 2021

Oh no no no, don't misquote me. You added an exclamation mark, which completely changes the tone of what I said, and aligned my comment with brats and Dom/mes, when I (very clearly) expanded it to those who look at labels as definitive things and dismiss people because of it.