being rude

SoaringFree(sub female)	SoaringFree(sub female) 2 years ago • Jul 23, 2022 2 years ago • Jul 23, 2022 SoaringFree(sub female) • Jul 23, 2022 If they wont take the time to teach you now, what makes you think they will take the time when they are your Dom? Cut your losses and put them in the "no" column and move on.
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Purple Freesia(sub female){Occupied}

2 years ago • Jul 23, 2022

First a BIG thank you for everyone who as provided their insight.

I am again reassured, that while I may at times be rude (who isn't), those who call me rude, or anything else for that matter because I don't give them what I haven't consented to is a really BIG red flag.

If I find myself being continually called rude, then I am not the right person them.

I'mME

2 years ago • Jul 31, 2022

A Cloud wrote:

If they cannot tell you what they find rude, it just means they're personal insecurities and demons have been triggered.
Being assertive and having clear boundaries is not rude but does disrupt other's assumptions/expectations of you. It is commendable that you are able to know and speak your truth but not everyone will like it.

Hi,
I was reading the first two answers and I kept shaking my head like a dog when they have ear mites, do you know what I refer to?
Then I read your blessed post and was able to stop shaking my head.

Thank you for your wisdom.

I'mME

2 years ago • Jul 31, 2022

djinni wrote:

You don’t owe anyone anything…. Period.

You have every right to hold things back and take the time to learn to trust someone before you open your whole world to someone. Sounds like gaslighting to me, which is so typical behavior when you aren’t giving an insta-dom what they want when they want it. Petulance and gas lighting. “You’re rude because you don’t give me what I want when I think I deserve it”. It’s like a toddler who screams “I hate you” at their mom because she won’t give them fruit snacks.

Stand your ground and take your time. You owe them nothing and any dominant worth your time will go on a journey with yiu, rather than a sprint so they can get in your panties.

Hello,

This, in a nutshell is glorious.

My writing has been.examined by a bonafide critic around these parts. [Sarcasm] my thoughts may not mean much.

I'mME

2 years ago • Jul 31, 2022

SoaringFree wrote:

If they wont take the time to teach you now, what makes you think they will take the time when they are your Dom? Cut your losses and put them in the "no" column and move on.

Hi,
I like your thinking ahead thoughts. They have nothing to teach the OP, when they are two strangers chatting. Just because someone attaches Dominant to their name means nothing. Actions should match words.

I'mME

2 years ago • Jul 31, 2022

I'm Enough wrote:

Hi,

I'm no expert on D/s, but I have experience a plenty in chatting with self-proclaimed Doms and Masters.
I have not looked at your profile, some write a book, some don't. There are profiles that clearly tell me who someone is. One learns to read between the lines.
Some advice, before chatting w/ anyone on any platform, flip to that profile and take the time to read it. I mean notice everything, if possible read their answers on questions.
It is not a foolproof method of getting a sense of whom you are dealing with, but I venture to say 60%-70% will give you clues.

About you being rude, I have no idea. I have read all kinds of things about myself that I had no inkling of [humor]. Imagine not knowing I was a cum dump, can you imagine not knowing that one self.
You are under no obligation to read anything about yourself from a complete stranger.
We are all different, come from different corners and what one person sees as rude, maybe another sees, oh she's not being rude, just giving information......

Good luck, never lose sight of who you are.

RizzoKenickie(sub female)

2 years ago • Jul 31, 2022

It is difficult to navigate this topic-
Not everyone subscribes to the same train of thought.
I myself believe in the old ways...
That being said: as a submissive I afford dominants respect for role and experience. However, I do not give any dominant the respect I give MY Dominant.
Sir, Master, even Daddy are titles of ownership.
Allowing rules to be SET over you or even how you speak is not a show of casual respect. That is them expressing dominance and aloowing it is a show of submission- subtle but still submission and many aee that as a foot in the door.
If I am speaking with a dominant other than one I have gifted my submission to... I use tact and a degree of respect but never allow any form of dominance to be exercised over me.
To do so would be a breach in protocol and show disrespect to my Dominant as well as myself.
You are a direct reflection of your dominant. So tact and wording are important.
Feel free to reach out to me privately if you need or want to talk.
Good luck ?

LoneWolf(masochist male)

2 years ago • Aug 3, 2022

Short answer. NO, that doesn't sound rude at all.

The internet is full of trolls and idiots...

If someone really wants to "get to know you" then they should have taken the time to read what you have written.

I get the "rude" comments a lot when I don't directly respond to a message. I even have that on my profile as well... We are people that have jobs and a personal life outside of the internet. I always try to respond once or twice a day or when time permits.

You should absolutely not feel pressured to share anything.... pics, videos or anything about yourself that you don't feel comfortable with. That's just "non-consensual" and it ruins the entire experience.

If people can't understand that. Then, "fuck 'em." They are the ones being rude and annoying!

I'mME

2 years ago • Aug 4, 2022

RizzoKenickie wrote:

Hi

I myself believe in the old ways...
That being said: as a submissive I afford dominants respect for role and experience.

This statement may work when meeting in person, such as an event, but even then I would afford no more respect then I would any other person just meeting them for the first time. I don't know what experience they may or may not have, I don't know if they show one face to people and another at home.

Online it becomes that above amplified...

Anyone can call themselves whatever they want, doesn't make it true. I don't put people on up on a slab of marble. There are mindsets in this lifestyle that think all s-types should be be naked and serving all Doms.

RizzoKenickie(sub female)

2 years ago • Aug 4, 2022

I understand what you're saying...
I could explain what I mean, but I see that you are hurt and angry. Possibly jaded to the point of being closed off at anyhing further I have to say.
I do not see a need to explain myself, only offer discussion in which to maybe offer a glimpse of hope. At this moment I don't feel hope is what you seek.
Again... good luck ?