New sub

We'reInthistogether​(dom male) • Oct 27, 2022

All great points people.

Bottom line all relationships.are built.oj trust, communication and respect(even dom/sub)

I mean me myself literally just had to talk the other day about how like she just wasn't following my orders she wasn't meeting my needs and just like plane on seem to have grown to another universe.

So she's kind of falling asleep last night and she can't finish me off. Whatever it happens a lot. Well this morning I started like fucking touching her and sucking on her tits. And she's like I don't want to, she's got 40 minutes before she needs to leave for work.

She says again and again she still attracted to me and loves me but there's a long period where I wasn't very sexual and she's turned her libido off.

Honestly I buy bullshit on all of it. Like we have great sex at least I think we do. Like I make her come all the time lots of times I think she feels inadequate she's struggling making me orgasm.

I don't know I'm at a crossroads too OP. I thought this is going to be the one. Like prior to this one I decided I wasn't doing any more this exclusive fucking monogamous relationship shit but here I am 2 years later about to have my heart fucking broken again.

I'm glutton for punishment what can I say. There's also a really big age gap. I'm 40 she's 23. You grow a lot in your twenties especially the early 20s and I think we're just growing apart.

I don't know everything else is perfect like I check her phone. Periodically. She is the most loyal trustworthy individual I've ever fucked with. She checks every box. Except right now I feel like I'm definitely not two or three on her agenda list I'm somewhere in the middle of the pack.

Sorry I didn't mean to hijack just feeling the same shit OP feels and accompanying posts.

Chalybe​(dom male) • Oct 27, 2022

We're,
I say this in a spirit of kindness.
Checking her phone is not a good thing. And yeah, I've been there, my last wife (and I do mean last) was much younger, and ended up leaving me for a younger guy - that wasn't a raging alky. I did similar stuff. I've been sober almost 15 years now.

Alky or not, I think older men take a risk with younger women - they outgrow the limerance, and see us aging before their eyes, and they think "maybe I don't want to be married to an ancient old man and be a widow at midlife. "

My current sub got to where she was accusing me of things, being overly possessive etc., I told her to hit the bricks. She realized the errors of her ways but it will take a long long time for that damage to heal. If she started checking my phone it would not be a question, she would be gone so fast her head would spin.

We'reInthistogether​(dom male) • Oct 27, 2022

Oh just to be clear the phone thing is like an open door policy that we have. We also have each other's location on Google maps where I can see where the fuck she is at at any moment in time and vice versa.

Some may say this is a lack of trust a complete violation of personal space. Nah I see it as the ultimate form of trust like I'm so devoted to you like here check my fucking information.

I do think though if she reads out my post on this forum she's not going to be a happy camper. Then again she could be a big fucking liar I don't know. I've been getting some weird vibes recentlyn

Honeymaey​(sub female) • Oct 27, 2022

Try dating someone close to your age, first of all; including subs.

Honeymaey​(sub female) • Oct 27, 2022

I believe men go for younger women because they have less of a measure for bullshit. Someone more mature would be more of a challenge and more fulfilling.

Solace​(dom male) • Oct 27, 2022

Hello HoneyMaey,

That's a very disrespectful view of men and such a statement does not benefit you in the least.

Men are certainly not pursuing younger women for how exploitable they are. Its also not your place to decide that dating a more "mature" woman would be more fulfilling, if it was men would be pursuing that. The reverse is actually true. Older women tend to accumulate trauma from past relationships, trauma that men are expected to heal or accept. For example anecdotally, your own disrespectful comment and seemingly negative outlook on men. To back this up with statistics, a survey across the general population in the U.S. showed that if a woman has slept with more than 5 men she has a 20% of saying she is in a happy marriage after five years. If she has slept with only one other partner it jumps to 80%.

This is not a statement that older women shouldn't or can't be loved. But to devalue younger women by calling them less fulfilling, and shaming men for their preference is not acceptable form of public grief.

Honeymaey​(sub female) • Oct 28, 2022

I wonder why women might have a negative view of men as they get older.

Solace​(dom male) • Oct 28, 2022

Thankfully there are statistics about that as well. Put simply, the majority of women are attempting to date the same small pool of men.

B L O N D I E​(sub female) • Oct 28, 2022

Women do not have a negative view of men as they get older. I am 52 and I honor and respect men more now than I ever have in my life. These generalizations are really harmful and doing a lot more damage than good. They really need to stop.

I'mME • Oct 28, 2022

This is a forum where people can comment on what the question, which of course can lead down some side roads.

Where it becomes toxic is when someone takes another's words and turns them into something else entirely.

I will also take this time to say this.

If you feel as if someone is being rude, okay, so that's how you feel. Xour feeling does not make anything true. It someone wants to disagree then disagree and give your thoughts or ask a question maybe to be certain you understand . It is not appropriate for Doms to chastise subs, slaves, s-types unless they belong to that Dom.