| buckle bunny(sub female){Walkalone } |
2 years ago •
Sep 18, 2022
Hi,
This world is new to me as well and I understand where you are coming from so many messages can be so overwhelming. I tend to reply out of respect, as I also see it takes courage for some to send them. So far I have been lucky in regards to respectful communication with the Dom's in here All besides one that thought he knew who and what I was and that my explanation was never excitable to the point that he called me a fake and that I was wasting people's time. Yet he was the one to message me. And then proceeded to block me. I try not to let those kind of people into my world as I see them as judgemental and unkind. I think what I am trying to say is stay true to who you are, you know your worth. I have made some wonderful friends in here that have helped me grow. |
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Online now
I'mME
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1 year ago •
Feb 14, 2023
Hannah97 wrote: First off, I’m sorry this happened to you, truly no individual deserves this. Second, I had a very similar experience with the first Dom I found online. We ended up having a full relationship, dating and all. Things were great, perfect actually. Then, something just snapped in him. He wouldn’t answer his phone or respond to messages. Initially I thought something happened to him as it seemed out of character, but then I knew better. I thought I had screwed something up, as I had no idea why he would do this. We were together for nearly a year, and I never received an explanation.
Just as you did, I reacted out of hurt and anger. I texted him after a few weeks and told him to delete my number and any photos that he had. I felt completely used, humiliated and naive. It’s the most sickening feeling. Fast forward 2 years and I still don’t trust online Doms, let alone relationships in general! Generally speaking, I’m on here for the blogs/forums, not necessarily relationships. Don’t get me wrong, there are really nice Doms on the site, but I find online relationships to be difficult. While you generally know who you’re talking to, assuming you video chat/send regular pics, it is still difficult to know fully who that person is. It’s so easy for people to have additional “lives” aside from the one they tell you about. Wrapping all of it up, my advice is to be weary of online Doms. It is so very important to know fully who you are interacting with. The minute you feel something is off or there’s a red flag, don’t ignore it, you have that feeling for a reason and it is valid. Again, I’m so sorry you had this experience, please don’t feel guilty, you are not the person at fault.🤍 Out of everyones response I have read so far ,(except the ones who acknowledged her pain and turned around and remarked about what the POS (Not a Dom) your answer is one of the best. It's quite common for 'Doms' to explain these POS's actions, are kind of overlook the part where if not for POS (plural) , this wouldn't be the thread, it's theight nature with how some comment (and I see s-types fall in to the same thing (I have theorist why that is) however it doesn't make it right. I'm not saying that Op doesn't need too shoulder their share of responsibility meaning some self-education and not relying solely on what somebody else tells them. But it's the blasé tone of responses that leaves me shaking my head. Do you understand what I mean? You get it. Thank you. |
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missusK(sub female)
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1 year ago •
Feb 14, 2023
Regardless of your side of the slash, vetting is a must. From what I've read, I would say you experienced a bit of sub frenzy - in which like many before you, you wanted to experience everything, asap. This is not uncommon. He actually did the right thing by making you wait.
I also see some NRE (new relationship energy) emerging here, in which you become emotionally attached to the way the new partner makes you feel. It's hard not to jump into that with both feet, because it feels so good. This is why vetting is so important. Vetting is really the most important thing you can do for yourself and your future dynamics. Yes, you want to make sure you are compatible, but you also want to make sure they are who they say they are, and you can be who you are with them. 100%. All the time. Vetting also allows you to know how they will behave in situations like this. Perhaps, you've just been saved a huge amount of heartbreak in the future.... If you're new to D/s, it is your job to make yourself as knowledgeable as possible, with or without a D type. You need to know your limits, your likes/dislikes, your reaction to situations, etc. You need to learn yourself, and that is always where your journey should begin, and end. You've ust learned that being ignored is a hard limit. Lesson learned. As for him pulling back when you "lost you shit." I'm not suprised. It sounds like he may be one of many who are after the chase. If that is the case, I am sorry you got caught in that trap. But that is nothing to do with you, even though it feels like you were the object of rejection, it's actually quite the opposite. If this is the case, he feels like he's conquered the unconquerable. You're a mountain, baby. Never forget that! Or maybe something did come up and his energy levels didn't allow him the space to train.... but a Dom will talk with you, and explain things. The right Dom will come, but while you wait, don't forget that you still have to do half the work... |
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