What do you consider to be "Sharing"

What do you consider to be "Sharing"

Secret Mind​(dom male) • Jul 22, 2023

No, I'm not talking about you sharing all of your emotional problems. I'm talking about your partner/ submissive/ dominant being shared with another person.
I'm not asking about what is and isn't sharing.
I want to know what you as an individual consider to be "sharing" for yourself when you're in a relationship/ dynamic.
What is your meaning of "sharing"? Give a few examples of things you are okay with them doing and things you aren't okay with.


This last question must be answered if you leave a reply.
Are you open to being sexual with other people while also not allowing your partner to be sexual with anyone else but yourself?

djinni​(dom female){smplylaura} • Jul 22, 2023

You answered the question in the title yourself. The question should have been the one in the last paragraph.

Also… no one “must” do anything. You posted in a public forum, you get what you get.

tallslenderguy​(other male) • Jul 22, 2023

i appreciate your qualifying the question as "individual," as i cannot see it as otherwise.

As a gay bottom with some sub, if my Top/Man want's to "share" me, it's connected to His desire and pleasure for me. For instance, if He is a voyeur and wants to watch while "sharing" me, my focus is going to be on Him and the lust He has and pleasure He derives from sharing and watching me... but my psychological connection is going to with Him. To me, the Men He is using are sort of like living dildos or toys He is using.

i do not derive anything from the reverse. i have no problem with Him having sex with others if we are in an open relationship, but to me that is not the same as me sharing. That is Him getting a need/desire met that maybe i cannot meet, but it's not the same as me possessing and sharing Him. i'd rather go without than have a Man 'give' me something (sexually) just because i want or need it, i "need" what He gives to be connected to His needs/desires in a symbiotic act.
If it's quid-pro-quo, i want nothing to do with it. That's fine if i want Taco Tuesday and He want's Pizza Tuesday, but i don't find it sustainable when it comes to sex.
Not an exhaustive answer, but some open thoughts on the topic.

KaeRose​(sub female) • Jul 23, 2023

I consider anything of a sexual or romantic nature sharing and while I don’t mind being shared sexually by my partner at THEIR discretion I do NOT share

IowaDom​(dom male) • Jul 23, 2023

Now bear in mind, my answer is in relation to myself, or any dynamic I am in.

Sharing is allowing any other person to have, hold, or borrow what to me are the most precious parts of any dynamic. And while I am fully aware of the fact that I likely am not the first person to experience many facets of the dynamic, I can also assure you that if I am in a serious dynamic, I honestly seek to be the last.

Now what of my partner? If I was approached about it, (ie THEY wanted to explore with others) it would trigger a very deep conversation at the very least, I would want to know what is missing, what they hoped to gain. I would also reevaluate the dynamic as a whole, and whether I wished to remain in it. Sharing somebody sexually to me is the same as sharing them emotionally, and imho, nobody belongs there but us.

Again, just as it all relates to me....
~ID~

Miki​(masochist female) • Jul 23, 2023

@ Secret Mind: Same with me as to the 2nd post. Sorry, fella.. I cannot adhere to the format you put forth in your starter post. But it does ask what I consider sharing.

I do not do dynamics or relationships but I still know what that is. It boils down to "monogamous" or "polyamorous" and both must fully buy into either one or the other.

If I were given to D/s arrangements I'd be more than OK with being "shared", lent out, whatever because if in such an arrangement, my role would beTPE. A "service sub" and/or a sex "slave"---

But that was just how I was wired. I always enjoyed (when active) being looked at, groped, etc.

I normally am very into all things erotic, coupled with disciplinary pain and humiliation. Helps me get off better. And if I was totally into being passed around, I'd be OK with the dude probing other partners. Definitely fights boredom.

On the other hand, a sub who does not want to be shared can expect the dom to remain monogamous as well, and vice-versa of course.

"BUT" and this is profoundly critical. This has to be discussed and agreed to prior to a relationship or dynamic going to "the next level" that is becoming a thing.

_______________________________________________

Side note, there's another rather new thread here on this topic, but it's a different approach, so I respoded on both threads.

Little Vixie​(sub female){Mgh30} • Jul 25, 2023

For my dynamic. I dont think I'd consider what we do sharing. We have that d/s dynamic but we aren't dating. We are both allowed to fuck and play with who we want, but he is happy domming me. I do play with others under the stipulation that whoever I play with understand what I do within kink.
We have discussed sharing key with another dom to do kink all together though

YvonneR • Jul 28, 2023

This is hard for me to answer because I have only ever been in monogamous relationships. My first thoughts are definitely not wanting to be shared or share but then I think about the otherside and if my Dom would be happy sharing me or having a sexual/intimate relationship either others I suppose I should be open to it. I would definitely have to learn how to deal with the jealousy issues the would arise on my side.

CanBiWife​(dom female) • Aug 3, 2023

Yes .. totally agree

As a Domme, I have shared my hubby with a few other women over the years

CanBiWife​(dom female) • Aug 3, 2023

I enjoy watching them together … my Inner Voyeur enjoys it immensely 🥰