Submissive verses Slave

I in no way feel a slave is demeaning. That is what is implied or told me from the individuals that I’m referring to.

I think both slave and submissive is up to the dynamic partners involved. Their choice. I also feel that within each of those dynamics it changes with different partners because we bring out different things in each other.

All I know is I’m not a slave. I may have some slave tendencies. That doesn’t make me a slave. I’m also tired of men trying to convince me I’m a slave. That is what I wrote the original positing. And I wanted to know if I was missing something.

Usually, I find when a so called "D" is TELLING (pardon the all caps, but wanted the added emphasis) a given "s" they are X, then they are focused on themselves and not on the "s" to begin with. They are being demanding instead of commanding.

I shut down when this happens. I close off to talking to these individuals. It’s a turn off when the words are used interchangeable. And then the resume questions begin. Next I’m being told I’m a slave not submissive. And that they can help with my journey ?

It happens often enough. So I was wondering if I was missing the meanings of slave and submissive. I read a lot of blog and forum posts. I’ve learned a lot from others. I appreciate everyone comments.

Many, particularly those new to this sub-culture, do not see the various flavors of kink as distinct and separate or overlapping from each other rather than all being the same thing.

Sadists often tell me they could teach me to like pain as another example. I do try to be as understanding as possible when someone doesn't know something that I find basic such as using sub and slave interchangeably, but it can be annoying when this happens repeatedly.

I have given this much thought
There are submissive's that are at different levels of submission. The training is based on their experience. The more training makes them evolve. The more they evolve it will help them to become closer to what they want to be. If a submissive has slave like tendencies they will be closer to a slave as they learn.
If they want to be a slave then they should be introduced to the gorean side of this lifestyle.
To be a true slave means to give everything to the master, and I mean everything.

Just my thoughts

M/s dynamics are as varied as D/s dynamics can be.

Subs and slaves have been debating over which one is better for years.


A D/s is a type of power exchange relationship. The level depends on what is negotiated.

The same is true for M/s.

I'm not sure why anyone who considers themselves to be a submissive on this platform would think putting down slaves is acceptable .

I didn’t say that slave are mindless twits. It’s the vibe and explanation from the wanna be D types. Trying to convince me that I’m a slave. All they want is a warm body. Where the female doesn’t think at all for themselves. One told me I would be isolated from everyone including friends and family. That I wouldn’t be allowed on this website or apps of any kind. And I could only go out of the house on his arm. He wanted me to be a robot/mindless twit.

I happen to be one of those few that claim to be a Dom AND a Master.. I also happen to now be a Daddy, which has transposed both of those monikers. I understand that all slaves are submissives, yet not all submissives are slaves. I will not accept a girl as a slave from the start. I believe that the slave mentality is there, but cannot be truly given until a certain degree of Trust and Respect have been earned by the person receiving the gift the sub is offering. I DO agree the interchangeable terminology is wrong, and experienced individuals understand this and will not make this faux pas..
I greatly appreciate you sharing your views. I have not met you as of yet, but look forward to more conversing in the future on these subjects..

Dom

Twinkle Eyes

My comment was NOT directed at you specifically. While specific words may not have been used, I have observed it from both sides of the slash. I should not have used the word submissive. I apologize.
Anyone who practices BDSM, whether new or not, that believes a certain role is only filled by someone that is mindless, what does that say about THEM?
On this same note, sort of, I want to bring up another point. I have read thousands of profiles on various platforms, I assure you I am not exaggerating. People who list kids as a limit on their profiles fall somewhere in the concept I wrote above.
WTF, someone who thinks that some of sub-culture of people must engage with children, yet here they are ready to engage with those that don't practice BDSM with kids?????????????????????

I'M not trying to turn this forum question into something else.

I'm sure that there will be folks who read this:
want to explain why someone would write that
That I'm being overly critical
That yada yada yada

Please refer back to where I wrote not trying to change forum discussion.

By the way, when forum discussions go awry, for the MOST part I don't think it's because people are trying to be little shit heads. As individuals we have different experiences that we bring with us. So when someone comments on a forum, sometimes in trying to relate that to the forum discussion, the connection can get lost.
Then there is the fact that not everyone comprehends on the same level, and instead of re-reading they jump the gun and snafu the situation up.

Okay, I'm done sharing some of my thoughts.

I appreciate your thoughts! Very good point about the kid comment. Something I hadn’t thought of. WOW. I’ve never even thought of putting that on my profile.

I think there are a lot of predators around here that aren’t being forthright and honest. The manipulation is palpable. That’s what it is when men try to convince me I’m a slave. Or think my submission is for me to be a robot. Just sitting there in my box until needed. ?

Also, I don’t feel you hijacked my original posting. I have been on and off this site for 7 years. Reading, learning, having conversations, and meeting some people. I learn from opinions that are different than mine. I just wanted it to be done in a respectful way. Thank you, for being respectful.