cyber scening

cyber scening

susan 146 • Mar 5, 2017

you can have an amazing scene cyber while getting to know someone. good communication and powerful but sensous demands are very exciting

lil_dirtysugar​(sub gender fluid) • Mar 6, 2017

Has been beyond a long time but yes id have to agree.

Villanelle​(staff) • Mar 6, 2017

I've done quite a bit of long distance D/s in my time. Many BDSM practitioners dismiss it but it shouldn't be surprising that something so intensely cerebral should translate so well to an online medium. For those of us who don't have the access, time, or ability to find a local D/s partner or BDSM community, online interaction is indispensable. If you haven't tried it, I recommend giving it a shot. And isn't it great that we don't have to choose between online or real time play - we can have both!

An aside, I do have aspirations for THE CAGE to have at least one dedicated roleplay chatroom at some point.

lil_dirtysugar​(sub gender fluid) • Mar 6, 2017

Thank you susan and Evangeline. With my location finding a real life connection feels hopeless. i may have to open myself up more to the notion of an online connection. Yesh, sum physical aspects will still be neglected but i so ache for the mental too. Giggle.. poor dusty strapless strap on

Enfield​(other female) • Jul 14, 2017

I'm curious about how this would work. Is it leveled up sexting? Or Tops telling subs what to do and them doing it in real life? Thanks!

Rod​(dom male) • Jul 15, 2017

It can be both. A lot of straight out online role play involves nothing more than elaborate, real time story telling. In these scenes no one actually does anything you just chat as if you are.
Next level would be Dom(me)s instructing subs with ideas for solo play, they then act these out as per instructions and reply with most commonly a report and sometimes photos or video as proof they did as they were told.
And finally the most interactive is done using something like Skype, real time instructed scenes. This can be a two way video call or just one way depending on circumstances.

Enfield​(other female) • Jul 15, 2017

Thank you Rod, very helpful!

Sierra16665​(dom male) • Jul 17, 2017

Agreed...really helpful. Just getting my feet wet with learning to be a Dom/Master, and cyber may be the only way.

Sierra16665​(dom male) • Jul 18, 2017

Can anyone post some links or resources to help guide someone who wants to be a Dom/Master, but cyber only? Specifically, are there samples of "scenes," or tasks that can be demanded that work better from a cyber-perspective? I find the idea of a D/s relationship via mostly text or email daunting.

Thanks

Rod​(dom male) • Jul 19, 2017

You are wise to be daunted by the prospect as it can carry some responsibility. Off hand I can't think of any real cyber resource as such but there are a few things you should consider.
First and foremost if you are going to give someone a task to perform solo you must understand the full implications of that task physiologically. This applies especially to any kind of bondage or binding, constriction of blood flow is a very real problem that can cause serious injury or even death due to induced blood clots. Any kind of blood play involving cutting or needles etc will need correct hygiene and wound care.
Now you may think that the sub should be taking care of these things themselves and many will, however in cyber you may come across a newbie who simply by pursuing their want to please will do something unwise or dangerous just to be a "good sub" and earn your praise.

So that said my practical advice would be;

Understand the implications of any task you set fully including possible risks and have a safety plan in case of problems.
Don't be overly ambitious with a new sub, start with small, short duration tasks to assess the subs ability to understand and carry out your instructions.
Provide full, clear instructions of how to perform the task and get your sub to confirm they understand fully before commencing.
If possible keep contact during the task to monitor progress and provide aftercare as appropriate (if you don't know what aftercare is google it).
Don't be unrealistic with tasks, I have seen some truly stupid ideas on forums given as tasks. While you may see some bizarre and amazing feats in various porn clips the average person cannot do these things without serious injury!
And finally, be flexible. The chances of finding a sub that has all the same kinks as you are slim, don't demand they follow all your kinks but instead work on the common ground and you can both have fun.