TPE Discussion

TPE Discussion

lambsone • Jul 18, 2024

Some people might think that TPE is about the Dominant being a control freak and the submissive being a doormat.

What is TPE to you?

Knightsundere​(sub male) • Jul 18, 2024

Oh I love this topic, great post

I think it's, at least in my interpretation, a precursor to expected immortality. Which is NUTS to say, but in my mind, if you're giving over total control to someone, then you're signaling that control and existence are separate things (likely a non-controversial opinion in these circles). And in its purest form, TPE is a permanent effect, especially in the mind of a sub where potentially even the thought process behind the technicalities of the exchange are considered "forbidden". In order for a sub to give "pure" TPE, the expectation of the sub needs to be that it doesn't "return" to them at some later point - the obvious kink there being that death is a stripping of control from the dominant and a return of decision (albeit, a physical one rather than mental) to the sub - hence, the expectation of never-ending submission and implication that spiritually, the submission extends beyond mortal life.

But like, it also just means that anything my domme would be interested in controlling, she gets to. I think it's really only effective if there's a very tight understanding of common goals and desires, TPE is something I'd wait to consider until after marriage, lol.

fluffypoppet​(sub female){Protected} • Jul 19, 2024

THIS!!!

Such a succinct definition. TPE= the D type gets to control whatever they are interested in controlling.

The amoung of control a D-type wants is going to vary from person to person. My first dynamic was working toward TPE I think. I was told we were about 70% of the way there and it took about 6 months to get that far. I'm not sure I can fathom what 100% TPE would have looked like.

Like everything else in the lifestyle TPE is deliciously customizable.

SageFlame​(sub female) • Jul 19, 2024

My 6 AM response: submerged, ideal, intense, dreamy and currently out of grasp.

Second thought: exchange is often an overlooked aspect of this dynamic. In my opinion, there is a reciprocal nature necessary in order for both to be fulfilled. Like any healthy connection, openness and honesty would be the medium for growth. This only being possible when acceptance and flexibility are part of the ingredients. We are ever changing beings and the dynamic either mirrors the evolution of human nature or it becomes outgrown and unfulfilling. After all, the definition of dynamic is constant change, activity and progress as well as new ideas. The exchange either evolves or falls apart depending on the communication and willingness of both parties. To be honest, when I was introduced to the idea of a D/s I automatically thought of TPE.

Now I will go back to simmer in my initial thoughts while sipping morning tea. Sunrise will be here soon!

LoveMaster​(dom male) • Jul 19, 2024

Total Power Exchange is to live a religious life, a life of faith and worship.
For the Dom, is a life of complete responsibility, adoption of the Sub as child.

_ Psalm 23 _

A psalm of David.
The LORD is my shepherd, I lack nothing.
He makes me lie down in green pastures, he leads me beside quiet waters,
he refreshes my soul. He guides me along the right paths for his name’s sake.
Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.
Surely your goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever.

Literate Lycan​(dom male) • Jul 19, 2024

Great responsibility from both parties.

This isn't just the submissive giving up "Total" authority and opening themselves up to another's absolute control but the Dominant assuming this mantle and responsibility for leadership. This must include the Dominant educating themselves deeper into ALL needs and safeguarding requirements of the treasure being handed them.

To quote Marvel: With great power comes great responsibility.

House Talion​(dom male) • Jul 19, 2024

Basic form of give and take where the Dom takes all control from the willing sub by what happens between them

TopekaDom​(dom male) • Jul 19, 2024

Most of what you read about TPE is unmitigated crap. Fantasy stuff by people who have no real clue on how hard it is to accomplish such a feat.

I'm not saying TPE is not possible, but it takes a great deal of work and understanding from both sides of the collar. This isn't just some on/off switch. It takes a conscious effort for everyone involved.

As Lycan said above, it takes a great deal of responsibility (and I will argue with him that stan lee said that first). Just saying "Because I said so" isn't going to make TPE fly.

Literate Lycan​(dom male) • Jul 19, 2024

No need to argue good sir. I can concur. I almost deferred to the great Stan Lee as the creator of most things Marvel in my initial post, although went with Marvel instead as it was uttered by Uncle Ben to Peter Parker (although to be precise, Voltaire coined the phrase in the mid-to-late 1700s prior to the use in comics and becoming the stuff of legend). But I digress - back to the original responses to the original post.

Sweetlydepraved​(masochist female){Mostly} • Jul 19, 2024

TPE for me is accepting Daddy’s decisions above my decisions. Daddy doesn’t control every aspect of my life on a daily basis, but he can choose to control something at anytime, and it’s my place to not simply go along with it but to value his decision and respect his will.

If he told me to spend 2 hours moving grains of sand from one pile to another instead of being here making posts, then on a good girl day I happily comply, bad girl days I might pitch a fit…which is pointless because it never works and then I’m worse off than I was to start.

Daddy also has a great deal of control over my emotions and can basically make me feel anything he wants me to feel at anytime. It’s like he has little buttons installed, there’s a happy button, a sad button, a horny button, an ambivalent button, all kind of buttons and I don’t even totally know where those are or when he’s pushing them. Sometimes I’m like heeey wait a minute and I catch on but that doesn’t really matter because how I feel is also his decision.

I am not easy to handle, Daddy says I’m the most challenging submissive he’s ever known, and that’s not talking about being a brat. Although I certainly have those moments too. You don’t get to these levels of control easily, and you don’t do it by picking out someone’s panties every day. It takes, like the gentlemen said above, faith and responsibility, and a whole bunch of resilience.