✨ If BDSM were a holiday… what would it look like?

Okay, hear me out. I was talking with a Dom and came up with this outrageous question: if our whole lifestyle/community were turned into an actual holiday, what traditions, decorations, games, or foods would end up being part of it?

For example, I imagine the decorations would be dramatic and symbolic — something bold as the centerpiece, surrounded by candles everywhere. The candles feel like a mix of passion, intensity, and a little nod to the people who enjoy a bit of pain with their pleasure.

And for dessert? I picture something soft and decadent, like a mousse or pudding — creamy, pillowy, light, but still indulgent enough to feel like a celebration.

So now I’m curious:
If this were a real holiday, what would you add?
Traditions? Rituals? A signature dish? A themed game? A color palette? A weird little annual custom only this community would understand?

Go wild with it — the more creative, the wetter.

WOW! That' a tough one. Through the decades, my Dom & I have attended many events and no two were alike.

We're a Femdom couple, so my rituals, etc. will differ from a male Dom/female sub dynamic. My point is that there are so many different types of BDSM, that it would be hard to fit all of them into one holiday.

You've peeked my curiosity as to how people will respond to your question.

A nation wide Folsum Street fair?

does anyone (of dino age) remember the OTK LOL I meant OWK (other world kingdom) I'll take that please

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Other_World_Kingdom



edited to change OTK to OWK my mind is elsewhere today LOL

If BDSM was a holiday, it would be like this:

Colors: Black & Chrome
(like Christmas has red and green, Easter has the pastels, Halloween is black and orange)

Smells: Leather, Cum, Candle Wax

Tastes: Salted Caramel, Dark Chocolate, Strawberries, and Copper like blood

Sounds: Cracking Whips, Moans, and Everyone reminding everyone to drink more water

Themes: Connection, and Communication

Traditions:
- Flogging Pole
- Nude Dance under the Moon before the Wild Hunt
- Spanking Circles
- A Negotiation Ritual
- Cuddle Sessions the morning after

You know you had a good one if you are a little sore and very happy the day after.

Holiday Wishes:
- May your afterglow last into the dawn.
- May you give and receive in equal measure.
- Wishing you a season of enthusiastic consent and satisfyingly sore muscles.

Toast:
- To the people who check-in, speak up, and show up.
- To connections that leave a mark- physically and emotionally.

I may have taken this too far... but I could see it so clearly.

Mardi Gras

Nurture the love that started from the very beginning, never give up, and work together to overcome every obstacle. Focus on lifting each other up, rather than placing blame. My partner and I have found that when we prioritize each other's happiness not a game but feeling , we find our own together . Let's strive to create a harmonious balance where both partners feel valued and supported. Together, navigate life's ups and downs, and build a foundation of strength that will carry you through the toughest times and into a brighter future.

World BDSM Day – History And Short-Notice Ways To Celebrate

We just found out it’s World BDSM Day. Aside from self-flagellating because we didn’t know it existed until now, we’ve also been investigating where the day came from and thinking about ways to celebrate. So here are our findings:

1. World BDSM Day was invented by the owner of a Spanish BDSM club in 2003
The club, Rosas Cinco, is in Barcelona and claimed to be the only club in Europe dedicated to BDSM when it opened in 2003. That same year, its owner, Kurt Walter Fisher, proposed July 24 as World BDSM Day. He chose 24/7 as a nod towards the practice of 24/7 BDSM (in which the submissive and dominant agree to keep to their BDSM roles full-time). He aimed to raise awareness and acceptance of the BDSM lifestyle globally. Towards that end, his club has held celebratory and educational conferences and shows around this date for 15 years.

2. Confusingly, there’s also an International Fetish Day in January
This one originated in the UK around 2008, in part as a protest against the Extreme Porn Laws that were then coming into force. The laws criminalised looking at images of consenting adults involved in certain BDSM practices, even if the acts were simulated. International Fetish Day is still going (especially with the introduction of updates to porn censorship laws a few years ago), and it’s customary to celebrate by wearing purple. Confused? Why not celebrate both?

3. Why do we need a World BDSM Day anyway?
While acceptance of BDSM and fetishes has increased over the past few decades, we still have a long way to go. As mentioned above, only a handful of years ago, the UK Government declared consensual kinky sex acts like face-sitting, flogging, and watersports to be illegal in porn, while ignoring a wide range of less kinky but equally extreme activities. “There appear to be no rational explanations for most of the… rules,” Jerry Barnett of the anti-censorship group Sex and Censorship told Vice UK. “They’re simply a set of moral judgements.”

People who engage in BDSM still run the risk of losing their jobs or having their fitness as parents investigated if they are ‘outed’. And due to kinkphobia, it is common for counsellors and psychotherapists to attempt to ‘cure’ kinky clients, regardless of whether the client has asked for this.

Which is ridiculous when you consider how many of us are actually kinky. The findings of sex surveys vary widely, but one recent survey found that 75% of Brits have a fetish of some kind. Greater kink visibility and education equals fewer kinky people living in shame and secrecy, and less unfair treatment for those who are ‘out’.

4. I’m convinced. So how can I celebrate?
If you’ve always wanted to experiment with BDSM but have never dared to try it before, maybe tonight’s the night (assuming you have a partner whose interest is as great as yours).

Alternatively, you could have a look around Fetlife, the premier social network for kinky folx, and start to plan your kinky debut.

For a down-to-earth, informative, and beginner-friendly take on the BDSM lifestyle, check out the Loving BDSM Podcast.

And if you want to support kinky people’s right to express themselves in the UK, check out and consider supporting the work of Blake on Patreon.

5. What if I want to experiment, but I don’t have any BDSM toys?
Any sex toy is a kink toy – it’s all in how you use it. Over the years, we’ve had feedback from sex toy reviewers and professional dominatrices that PULSE is an excellent toy to use for edging and forced orgasms on a penis-owning sub. As The Big Gay Review said back in 2017:

“I can clamp it onto my other half, switch it on and then blindfold him. As the PULSE does its thing, I can move around and tease him in all manner of ways – even more so if I have restrained him before hand and he can’t move. It’s great to just leave the PULSE on and have it milk him until he can’t take it anymore.”

If you don’t have any bondage equipment on hand, check out this useful post from Kinkly that includes tips on forms of erotic restraint that don’t require rope.

Have fun liberating your kinky self – and being part of the sex positive movement as you do it!