Corrupt A Wish

LMAO. i think that was brilliant.

Granted... but only you can see it.


I wish my house had a moat.

Granted. But your house is on the wrong side, in the middle of South Africa, and has the only water in a hundred miles.

I wish I could teleport anywhere.

Granted, but it’s the first confirmed snuff movie. Your body is never found and documentaries are made of you for years to come. Your name becomes notorious in true crime forums and through conspiracy threories and the minds of deviants in the dark web your memory lives on.

I wish I could go without 6 sugars in my tea.

You no longer require 6 sugars in your tea, but recent studies suggest that drinking unsweetened tea causes diminished sexual desire.


I wish that people were incapable of deception.

Granted. But the unvarnished honesty causes you to have a psychotic breakdown and question everything for the rest of your life.

I wish I was a world renowned gourmet chef.

Granted, but you gave all patrons food poisoning and your reputation will never be restored.

I wish I could clone myself

Granted, but now you both want the same man and neither you nor you share.

I wish I could have a puppy!

Granted, but its a particularly harsh winter and you are forced to eat your young.. (sorry).

I wish I had perfect eyesight.

Granted, but its a particularly harsh winter and you are forced to eat your young.. (sorry).

I wish I had perfect eyesight.

Granted, but all you can see is in black and white.

i wish i had superhuman strength.