Online now
Online now

Are you in a BSDM marriage?

I'mME
1 year ago • Feb 24, 2023
I'mME • Feb 24, 2023
TopekaDom wrote:
I'mME wrote:

TopekaDom,
Had you any experience with a partner being a Switch before? Did you suggest that she may enjoy a sub or did she suggest it?
And how did you initially feel when the power exchange shifted slightly, you nor owning her anymore but still had her submission?

Obviously it's


My wife is as she needs to be. It made me no nevermind when she figured she needed to stretch her Domme wings. It is just my philosophical view point that as a switch, she can not be property. But that is just me. I have no problems with it. Some of the s types we have played with in the past have had problems with it but not all of them.

To answer your first question, no she was the first switch. In fact, she is the only switch (I am still unsure what to classify the Domme who turned sub for me. it was the only time I ever met her and never heard from her again). It was also her need that prompted her crossing.


TopekaD,

I'm not sure as I have not given it any deep thought, on the ownership of someone if they Switch to Dom with their own sub.

I have seen profiles on FET, where this was the situation and the female sub system that their Dom/Master was the only one who would own them , or there would never be another, things like that. I never provoked a thought that it may seem odd.

Thanks for answering.


Nonya
TopekaDom​(dom male)
1 year ago • Feb 24, 2023
TopekaDom​(dom male) • Feb 24, 2023
[quote="I'mME"

I'm not sure as I have not given it any deep thought, on the ownership of someone if they Switch to Dom with their own sub.

I have seen profiles on FET, where this was the situation and the female sub system that their Dom/Master was the only one who would own them , or there would never be another, things like that. I never provoked a thought that it may seem odd.

Thanks for answering.


Nonya[/quote]

The ideal of ownership is varied though out the lifestyle as many other concept. What one believes may not be what others do. It is up to you to decide what is good for you.
I'mME
1 year ago • Feb 25, 2023
I'mME • Feb 25, 2023
TopekaDom wrote:
[quote="I'mME"

I'm not sure as I have not given it any deep thought, on the ownership of someone if they Switch to Dom with their own sub.

I have seen profiles on FET, where this was the situation and the female sub system that their Dom/Master was the only one who would own them , or there would never be another, things like that. I never provoked a thought that it may seem odd.

Thanks for answering.


Nonya


The ideal of ownership is varied though out the lifestyle as many other concept. What one believes may not be what others do. It is up to you to decide what is good for you.[/quote]

TopekaDom,

Yes it is varies , the different combinations or what is possible is endless. I'm not someone who would think about a concept unless it was before me , in other words , I don't worry too much about anything , and I don't bring worry to my door unnecessarily.

We miss too much of what is in the now phase. And worry can become a habit. A bad habit.


Thank you again.
mjss
1 year ago • Feb 25, 2023
mjss • Feb 25, 2023
We have been married over 30 years and in a loving M/s lifestyle. Yes life, work, family does get in the way but if you are committed you can work round it all.

We have had a lot of fun over the years and think we have grown stronger as time has gone on.

You do have to make comprises in daily life that's just the way of living it 24/7 but it is amassing what you can hide in plain sight and unless you enjoy our lifestyle you never see it for what it is.
LatexHer​(dom male)
1 year ago • Feb 25, 2023
LatexHer​(dom male) • Feb 25, 2023
I have been MARRIED combined for over 44 years, but it was to 3 very different women one at a time! I began my journey as a Dom long ago when I discovered that my first real love enjoyed being handcuffed. After dating for a year, we married played often, had children, and bought a home. After 14 years - issues began as I became more Dominant, while she became afraid that others would find out! The combination of me seeking more from her and her not being willing to comply led to that marriage ending.

My second marriage lasted 10 yrs. to a much younger, but statuesque woman! She had what my first lady lacked - firm large breasts, and a willingness to perform almost anything I wished to engage in. Again this lady was somewhat inhibited by my then-developing fetish for tight-laced corsets on her and more stringent bondage play. I could not get over her enjoyment of breath play. We began to discuss our issues and later fought some as our sex life fell apart. I remain reluctant to engage in dangerous breath, knife, skat, or blood, play to this day! Wished her well at the courthouse as it ended.

My third and possible final marriage ended through interference from our children - hers and mine but lasted 20 yrs. Life provides challenges many do not see in their 20s, 30, or 40s. Challenges such as surgeries, broken bones, blood thinners, weight gain, and hysterectomies. while we still managed to play, the challenges greatly interfered! The full catsuits I purchased for her became too small, and so did the corsets, girdles, and the like. Blood thinners - caused her to bruise badly whenever she enjoyed being spanked, paddled, or whipped. As her Dom I relished in putting her through hour-long restraints but found that the bruising looked so bad that while we were enjoying a dinner out - a woman followed her to the ladies' room and asked if she needed help being away from me, seeing the bruising (Rope Marks) on one ankle and wrists!

I still speak to all three former loves - two still call me and ask for advice for various reasons, two are remarried but only one remains a subbie for her husband. Sometimes women grow out of their natural desire to submit!

TRUE FACT - Relationships are hard. I will continue to move forward, and hope that there are KINKY angels who wish to wear golden chains when I get there!
OwnedHouseslut
1 year ago • Feb 28, 2023
OwnedHouseslut • Feb 28, 2023
Been in a collared relationship for 5 years that just resulted in a marriage (second for both of us) this past Oct. It offers legal protection as life happens.
We don't have "rules" per se- Master E taught me rules can ruin things especially when in the moment of playing with others. It is more a developed respect for each other and our roles. It enhances communication and trust.
For example- I don't ever speak evil or down to him especially in public- even in jest. But my opinion does matter! I picked out our house! Haha.
He loves having two women suck his cock. I struggled at first since that is an act of worship to me, but because I saw how much pleasure he got from it---it gave me pleasure but on the flip side-we have had two subs play with us that something seemed off. Master listened to my concerns and ended it very kindly.
I guess my point is a BDSM marriage is just like any other marriage- it works if you put the effort of communication and respect into it. Love comes naturally from the respect and communication given to one another.
MandatorySub
1 year ago • Mar 24, 2023
MandatorySub • Mar 24, 2023
Wow. I thought there would be more responses from married people. Interesting
LatexHer​(dom male)
1 year ago • Mar 24, 2023
LatexHer​(dom male) • Mar 24, 2023
Was in a BDSM marriage for the last 20 yrs, but it ended due to many reasons. We both got older and both had some physical issues. She began taking the blood thinner Coumadin, which made her bruising horrible. She also has a hysterectomy and a few other issues. While I experienced lower testosterone myself.
To make a long story short - In 2018 my grandkids moved back in with us and later my son after his divorce. The pressures of Covid in 2020 became overburdening for both of us and our marriage ended in 2021
The lack of intimacy, play, and other issues capped off a relationship. She and I still talk and I will say I enjoyed the dance we once shared while it lasted!