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DeepEmbrace​(dom female)
2 years ago • Apr 13, 2022
DeepEmbrace​(dom female) • Apr 13, 2022
Oceanic wrote:
Sasa wrote:
Welcome here and I hope you have a lot of fun and for sure you will find your tribe. Also congratulations to the virtue group too, you got to know them straight away. They will follow you with a steadily raised index finger, but they just try to protect everyone or at least some ... if you like or need that or not, lol. They are good people, but ignore them if you want and follow their advices if it fits.


Calling us "the virtue group" implies that our concern is not genuine, or that we who speak up against ignorance and prejudice should keep quiet, lest we be critiqued by people like you. Can people go overboard sometimes and actually be virtue signaling? Yes. Is that always the case? Definitely not. I can't speak for the experience of others, but I am both Jewish and bisexual, so I was speaking just as much about others as I was about myself. Is your indifference and silence toward ignorance and prejudice really so much better than those who speak out against it?


Thank you for writing this reply. Absolutely 1000% on point. I was literally going to respond with the same thing, but I try NOT to waste my time and energy on these bigots, enablers, and apologists on here.

It is absolutely disgusting how on this site people will go out of the way to defend racism, sexism, homophobia, transphobia, and every other kind of oppression, and that is deemed OKAY and PERFECTABLY ACCEPTABLE and NEUTRAL by the masses. But God forbid some of us challenge this disgusting behavior and climate... then we are harassed, piled upon, viewed as disingenuous, and labeled as the problem because we spoke up against the actual problem.

I have not seen any "virtue signaling" on The Cage. I feel that is just a bs term concocted to delegitimize anyone who dares speak out against oppression. Barely anyone on here challenges the constant bigotry and fuckery that goes on and those few that do have suffered greatly for doing so. Why on Earth would they be doing that and putting themselves on the line just for kicks, just for nothing? People are full of it and making up shit. But, again, the majority on this site think everything is a-ok UNLESS you speak up against what is wrong... that's a no-no.

I am a black queer woman (in addition to other aspects of my identity). I experience many different forms of oppression in all spaces. The Cage is but one of them. Myself and many others who identify as people of color, women, LGBTQ, and/or allies have had to literally take time away from this website because of the constant bigotry, harassment, and more that goes on here. But noone gives a fuck about that. But they want to complain when people have had enough and/or speak out about it.
DeepEmbrace​(dom female)
2 years ago • Apr 13, 2022
DeepEmbrace​(dom female) • Apr 13, 2022
Spellbound Wytch wrote:
Oceanic wrote:
Calling us "the virtue group" implies that our concern is not genuine, or that we who speak up against ignorance and prejudice should keep quiet, lest we be critiqued by people like you. Is your indifference and silence toward ignorance and prejudice really so much better than those who speak out against it?
Far be it from me to answer for anyone other than myself—but I *am* going to suggest that you misunderstood the context. English is not Sasa's first language but she is a kind and lovely woman. I believe her remarks were a tongue-in-cheek criticism of another comment made by a male dominant though.


I don't agree, WW, [I mean SW because I see that your name changed! icon_smile.gif] Sasa clearly referred to a group not an individual. Also, she has made statements on other forums and/or blog posts indicating similar sentiments. I believe she was directing her comments at myself and others. She/her defenders and apologists can hide behind whatever excuse they want, but I see through it. I blocked her a long time ago because she was saying similar things on forums, blog comments, blog posts, or whatever it was.

That's one of the few benefits of threads/blog posts/blog comments/convos like this... it allows people to show their true colors so everyone can block to their heart's content to better curate their experience on The Cage. If only we could mute people on here, sigh...
event horizon{NotLooking}
2 years ago • Apr 13, 2022
event horizon{NotLooking} • Apr 13, 2022
DeepEmbrace wrote:
Oceanic wrote:
Sasa wrote:
Welcome here and I hope you have a lot of fun and for sure you will find your tribe. Also congratulations to the virtue group too, you got to know them straight away. They will follow you with a steadily raised index finger, but they just try to protect everyone or at least some ... if you like or need that or not, lol. They are good people, but ignore them if you want and follow their advices if it fits.


Calling us "the virtue group" implies that our concern is not genuine, or that we who speak up against ignorance and prejudice should keep quiet, lest we be critiqued by people like you. Can people go overboard sometimes and actually be virtue signaling? Yes. Is that always the case? Definitely not. I can't speak for the experience of others, but I am both Jewish and bisexual, so I was speaking just as much about others as I was about myself. Is your indifference and silence toward ignorance and prejudice really so much better than those who speak out against it?


Thank you for writing this reply. Absolutely 1000% on point. I was literally going to respond with the same thing, but I try NOT to waste my time and energy on these bigots, enablers, and apologists on here.

It is absolutely disgusting how on this site people will go out of the way to defend racism, sexism, homophobia, transphobia, and every other kind of oppression, and that is deemed OKAY and PERFECTABLY ACCEPTABLE and NEUTRAL by the masses. But God forbid some of us challenge this disgusting behavior and climate... then we are harassed, piled upon, viewed as disingenuous, and labeled as the problem because we spoke up against the actual problem.

I have not seen any "virtue signaling" on The Cage. I feel that is just a bs term concocted to delegitimize anyone who dares speak out against oppression. Barely anyone on here challenges the constant bigotry and fuckery that goes on and those few that do have suffered greatly for doing so. Why on Earth would they be doing that and putting themselves on the line just for kicks, just for nothing? People are full of it and making up shit. But, again, the majority on this site think everything is a-ok UNLESS you speak up against what is wrong... that's a no-no.

I am a black queer woman (in addition to other aspects of my identity). I experience many different forms of oppression in all spaces. The Cage is but one of them. Myself and many others who identify as people of color, women, LGBTQ, and/or allies have had to literally take time away from this website because of the constant bigotry, harassment, and more that goes on here. But noone gives a fuck about that. But they want to complain when people have had enough and/or speak out about it.


So much this. I'm glad you're in this thread.
Spellbound Wytch{Mr. Parker}
2 years ago • Apr 13, 2022
Spellbound Wytch{Mr. Parker} • Apr 13, 2022
DeepEmbrace wrote:
That's one of the few benefits of threads/blog posts/blog comments/convos like this... it allows people to show their true colors so everyone can block to their heart's content to better curate their experience on The Cage. If only we could mute people on here, sigh...
I share your deep desire to have a more Facebook like experience - in that once I block someone on FB, they literally become 100% invisible to me. I delight in that satisfying and warm feeling of having "buried someone alive" (while they were still yapping). 😂

(although I must admit I've never seen the problem you're speaking of here)
Lazuli
2 years ago • Apr 13, 2022
Lazuli • Apr 13, 2022
Hugs and watch you blogs to make sure they fit into community standards.
I'mME
1 year ago • Apr 12, 2023
I'mME • Apr 12, 2023
DeepEmbrace wrote:
Welcome to the The Cage!

Thank you for posting this so we all can see each other on here. I have been on here over a year and many of the people posting on this thread I did not know were on here. I know I have felt alone on this site before many times due to not seeing any other black people here plus seeing racist ignorance/abuse/harassment being posted on the site by white members.

Black representation, connection, and community is important. We are NOT alone! We can reach out to each other and support each other.

And much appreciation to those who have posted resources and links in this thread!



DeepEmbrace
* I know I have felt alone on this site before many times due to not seeing any other black people here plus seeing racist ignorance/abuse/harassment being posted on the site by white members.*

Who is posting racist shit? Let me know, been two days since I was blocked by someone.
I know back last year I saw a post in a group on Reddit. It was by a young lady who was poly, single, and black. She actually wrote that while she was poly , she there was no place for space for her in poly. (Or something akin to those words) It moved me to tears, as I started reading the comments, support came forward and by the next day, I believe she and some of the other folks had started a group.

I may check in and see if they are still going.
I don't remember seeing this post, but hell I may read further and see I commented. Lol, my point is until someone speaks up, others don't know.
I'mME
1 year ago • Apr 12, 2023
I'mME • Apr 12, 2023
MidKnightSun wrote:
Defender wrote:
Looking at the question from over here in England, I do find it it sad when people find it necessary to identify themselves by their skin colour - and look for groups of people who have the same skin colour as themselves.

If, as a white person, I did that I would instantly be called a racist.

I prefer to look at people as human beings first, kinksters second - and race/colour nowhere.

I would prefer my lifestyle not to be segregated by skin colour.

Maybe I am wrong.


Now that that's done and you got it all out of your system, do you feel like you've accomplished anything?

Do you feel heard? Do you feel like you've supplanted the narrative?

Maybe you can write an essay on each prompt and submit that as well.

I will be checking grammar and spelling. Extra credit if the light bulb turns on and you realize, "No one asked you".

Let it serve as your education on race relations.



Hold on a second with this. This is a forum and it's my understanding that people don't have to be asked to comment.

Anyone who has been privy to some of the quipping back and forth of Defender and me, would still you that there is no love loss.
I understand where the comments are stemming from, witht that said, the vehemence that came along with this and a couple others is not an environment in which people can learn and/or see a different side.
I'mME
1 year ago • Apr 12, 2023
I'mME • Apr 12, 2023
Oceanic wrote:
Spellbound Wytch wrote:
Oceanic wrote:
Calling us "the virtue group" implies that our concern is not genuine, or that we who speak up against ignorance and prejudice should keep quiet, lest we be critiqued by people like you. Is your indifference and silence toward ignorance and prejudice really so much better than those who speak out against it?
Far be it from me to answer for anyone other than myself—but I *am* going to suggest that you misunderstood the context. English is not Sasa's first language but she is a kind and lovely woman. I believe her remarks were a tongue-in-cheek criticism of another comment made by a male dominant though.


If that's the case then I apologize if I did misunderstand, but she probably could have replied directly to his comment so as not to allow that confusion. Also, one person is not a group, so I don't think you're correct.


Oceanic,

Sasa is a kind, genuine person, and you DID misunderstand what she wrote, lol, she has experienced and gives good advice.