Would you ever tell them?

Mistress Maree​(dom female){Non} • Oct 27, 2019

My Family except my brother know......he just wouldn’t understand at all. Non of my Friends know and I won’t be telling them anytime soon.

SubDraco​(sub male){Caged} • Oct 27, 2019

none really "know" but i do wear a collar. but its a subtle collar.

Zedland​(dom male) • Oct 27, 2019

My family found out, but I don't know if I would have told them, even if it is not something we discuss. I imagine if I were to bring someone to Christmas dinner there would be some awkward conversations and maybe a half-hearted attempt to hide all the rope in the house.

Some of my friends know, others don't. That really depends on what kind of conversations we have. Thankfully the lifestyle is not something comes up in casual conversation all that often.

ADIDAS • Oct 27, 2019

My circumstances are different.... I'm married to a vanilla man. Plan on staying that way and enjoying this lifestyle. I'm sure there's a lot of you out there right now scratching their heads trying to figure that out.... Haha! Well, I have, we'll leave it at that.

To address the question; I did tell my hubby. I didn't come right out and say I'm a submissive. He wouldn't have understood that, so I described what I needed to get off. I kinda had to since he found my huge bag of toys and accessories... 🤭
Naturally, at first he thought I was having a standard vanilla garden variety affair. But after talking and explaining what everything In the bag was and how it worked, I assured him his thoughts are groundless. He understands that he can't or won't meet these needs in me. I have found a way to meet them and makes me a happier wife for him. As people we change and grow as we age, our taste for things change, desires, needs, priorities, etc. ..... everything is always changing which is why hubby and I give each other the room to do that... also how we've been together for 40 years. I love him more than life itself!!! He's a one of a kind man and I'm a very lucky woman to have him!

gospodin​(dom male){Married} • Oct 28, 2019

My vanilla wife is the only one who knows, and she refuses to talk about it with me so I just have swirls of anxiety and doubt about what she really thinks I am.

I recorded audio essays explaining myself, but she couldn't make it past the foreword.

I wish I had someone who knew. Someone I could talk to about it in my own voice and get support. I just don't trust anyone with that.

Not even my wife.

sexycurves​(switch female) • Oct 28, 2019

My adult children know. They know when I go to a munch. Safety is important, right? I haven't told anyone else, but it's not a secret as such. I am a private person and when I tell someone it's because I trust them not to gossip.

A few close friends know

curlyte1​(sub male){None} • Oct 28, 2019

I have a few close friends who know of my interest in the lifestyle. I have however not shared this with any family members and none of them would suspect and would be shocked, but, ok with it. My family is very open minded and accepting, but the old adage, "what they don't know wont hurt them" comes to light with me not sharing with them

AKittenforSir​(sub female){JohnBond} • Oct 28, 2019

Over the last several months I’ve begun telling more and more people in my friend/family circle about my D/s relationship. I don’t do so in a dramatic “I have an announcement to make” fashion. I just talk about our relationship as naturally as if I was talking about a vanilla relationship. Depending on the person's reaction to whatever I’m saying, I’ll either continue to expand on the subject or let the conversation die. I’ve found that most of my circle isn’t at all surprised by my revelations as many of them have seen Sir and I together and know that our dynamic is very intimate and intense and they often express acceptance or even jealousy.

My long term goal is for us to be completely 100% open to everyone at all times. We don’t really shy away from the dynamic now in public but we do try to be respectful and not thrust our dynamic onto the rest of the world. Especially if there are children around.

Lotus​(sub female) • Oct 28, 2019

Nope. Part of the fun for me is that it is my secret. I don’t expect my family or friends to understand and wouldn’t want judgement of close ones to tarnish my enjoyment of it.

BDSM DOM​(dom male) • Oct 29, 2019

Personally I find this situation a difficult one. A couple of my friends knows I am into the lifestyle. And they are as well. But I wont tell my family (out of home family) about my lifestyle choice. They wouldn't understand it. In fact they would probably never talk to me again. Because a lot of my family is closed minded. Some things are best left unsaid. Well where family is concerned that is. I am meaning my own. So please don't think I am speaking for others. I am just speaking of my situation.

As for friends on this. I have a few that I haven't told yet... But I do know they don't judge. So I believe in my heart they wouldn't defriend me over this. They might feel uncomfy yes. But they would still talk to me I believe.

That is just my guess...