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The Phases of (brat) Submission

Quirkyrebel​(sub female)
4 years ago • May 14, 2020
Quirkyrebel​(sub female) • May 14, 2020
To be honest with you I trust no one! My bratty tendencies are just my ways of messing around when confusion, confidence, or even playfulness are what I'm feeling. You seem like an obedient sub. But don't worry about the trust issues. What makes me not want to be their sub is wanting to have my space to gain resources and learn that confidence that gets me to explore. (Companion preferred) Not just in the romantic aspect. I like the company of others for whatever I do. I don't always like to be alone! I'm sure with time you will find someone. Regardless of how much you trust others. Trust can be earned. Not having trust is not the same thing as having bratty tendencies. Please do remember that. I've just described myself for my bratty tendencies! lol
skyrich​(dom male){rottenbrat}
4 years ago • May 14, 2020
@Jenstar
You must be able to trust in order to give your submission. That trust shouldn't come easily. The dom must earn it from you. Not trusting right off the bat doesn't make you a bad sub, or a bad brat. It means that you are intelligent. icon_smile.gif If the dom can't gain your trust, then you are absolutely right. You cannot be their sub. This is as it should be.

If you haven't, please read my blog posts: "Some Definitions", "Responsibility", "Commitment" and "The Journey".

@MoonMissy
Are you sure none of them apply? Would you be willing to describe your process, purely for research purposes, of course. icon_smile.gif

@Quirkyrebel
Trust is a big part of the sub, especially the brat, mindset. Trust in one way or another is almost always the reason she "brats out". Either because trust is there and she feels safe, or trust is not there, and she feels fear, for example.
Little moon​(sub female){Not lookin}
4 years ago • May 14, 2020
@Rich so far as I can tell none do nope, nada, zip, nilch. Truth be told I tend to get ghosted/ditched or they taper off chasing skirts and swimming closer waters thus far. As for process?.. Pretty much conversations, being noetisexual/sapiosexual makes it a tad difficult to find decent prospects.

@SBD any input on my behalf?
skyrich​(dom male){rottenbrat}
4 years ago • May 14, 2020
@MoonMissy
Well.. to be fair there's not been much in the way of submission going on if they're ghosting you or chasing skirts. icon_sad.gif
I'm so sorry that you've been having such a time w/ the less evolved. icon_sad.gif
SirsBabyDoll​(sub female){Pizza+☕}
4 years ago • May 14, 2020
Jenstar wrote:
I have a question!!!!!

I’m very new! So please forgive me. I don’t have a Dom. However, I feel like if I trust someone FIRST they can have my full submission. I think me not trusting someone first makes me not want to be their sub. I have met a few men here who just seem very shady to me. And one man here who I thought was SO PERFECT, but ended up basically leading me on ... I hate to sound so naive- but how does one know that the non-trust isn’t just bratty tendencies?

For instance- the one whom I thought was perfect, I knew I would easily submit NO MATTER WHAT. No questions asked. And the shady dudes ... well ... I don’t even want to speak to them ...



Jester,

Everyone was new at SOME point in there life. Even the Doms, tho they like to THINK they popped out of their momma's belly with a whip in one hand and a paddle in the other yelling, "bend over bitch and present tit." So don't worry about that.

First, BE YOU! Pretend you are in a bar. How do you get to know a person who walks up to you? Do you allow yourself to be spoken to like a piece of meat and bend over simply because the bar is a BDSM themed bar? No! We are all still human and we all still live in the vanilla world with vanilla lives. It's ok to start slow. The MOST important part is to BE YOU. Communicate. Learn...and I'm not talking "I'm your Dom now and you will learn everything from me. Trust me." I'm talking go out and read EVERYTHING...The good, the bad, the insane. Do not discount ANYTHING. Learn about shit you KNOW you have no interest in trying for yourself. Why?

So you can identify it in the ones who try to hide it.

There is a moto in BDSM....

Your Kink Is Not My Kink But Your Kink Is Ok.

Learn the landscape and discover what moves YOU to submit. It could be very different than how someone else is moved. I know mine is different.

Mine does not involve kneeling and head bowing.....so what moves YOU? Learn you so you can teach others about you.
Little moon​(sub female){Not lookin}
4 years ago • May 14, 2020
Tis all good most cannot stand the storm long enough to reach the calm, they run away in fear or seek calmer waters. It does not make for any less of a storm and that is simply how it is. My love of storms is strong enough to endure, as is my love of calm 💪🙏
SirsBabyDoll​(sub female){Pizza+☕}
4 years ago • May 14, 2020
MoonMissy wrote:
@Rich so far as I can tell none do nope, nada, zip, nilch. Truth be told I tend to get ghosted/ditched or they taper off chasing skirts and swimming closer waters thus far. As for process?.. Pretty much conversations, being noetisexual/sapiosexual makes it a tad difficult to find decent prospects.

@SBD any input on my behalf?


Missy, you already know my opinions but you also know how much I love you.