what do you look for

what do you look for

blossoming​(sub female) • Jan 17, 2021

all answers welcome.

if you’re a dominant man/woman looking for a sub- what’s the first thing you look for? what’s a total deal breaker? what’s your favorite and least favorite things.

if you’re a submissive looking for a dominant.. what’s your favorite things/have to haves/and deal breakers.

i’m very curious

poppyclaire​(sub female) • Jan 17, 2021

I look for someone who makes me feel safe. Consistency is important to me. Someone who is responsible. Someone who respects my boundaries. Very boring and practical stuff lol.

blossoming​(sub female) • Jan 17, 2021

i love that for you!

House Talion​(dom male) • Jan 17, 2021

If I was looking for a sub I'd look for mutual interests while clothed and common mutual fetishes while wearing less. Enjoys oral, loves to be on top during sex.

As I'm not looking for a sub, I'm looking for anyone that would have good use of my knowledge and experience of the lifestyle

spaceprincess​(sub female) • Jan 18, 2021

Someone who wants to be my friend first, to really know me first. I want to feel protected and safe, like anything can’t hurt me if I’m with him (except him but in a good way lol) and a deal breaker? Not respecting my boundaries

poppyclaire​(sub female) • Jan 18, 2021

Not respecting boundaries is the biggest red flag

Tthomas • Jan 19, 2021

The first thing I look for is age
The second is distance.

The third and most important thing is where we are at in our search and if we have common wants and needs.
Our kink has to line up.

After that, conversation and more conversation. You can never ask or answer to many questions.

MaxSilver​(dom male) • Jan 19, 2021

Someone that’s not just in it for sex but something more romantic

MisterAshmodai​(dom male) • Jan 19, 2021

When considering a potential sub, I look for someone who shares my sense of adventure, my love of learning and experimentation. For me, kink is a means of finding your true self in a way that is inhibited by society and our own internal fears. As a Dom, my job is to facilitate this exploration, and I enjoy doing so.
Deal breaker for me are monogamy, closed mindedness, and on a more basic level, an aversion to anal play.
My favorite thing is a sub who enjoys role play and anything horror themed.

Nysa​(sub female) • Jan 19, 2021

For me the biggest "have to have" is trust that I can completely let go and be safe. The deal-breaker is when I am told what I think or feel.