Locked in Closet to Sleep

Locked in Closet to Sleep

laylalikesitall • Mar 4, 2023

Do any doms or subs find the time the sub spends tied up and gagged in the closet to sleep overnight is an effective way for the sub to have a lot of time to reflect on her goals as a good sun or would you think of it as a punishment?

Kurai Mori​(dom male) • Mar 4, 2023

Hmm... strange question... I hadn't thought of putting a sub in a closet.
Especially for reflective time. Or as a form of punishment.

I always encouraged my subs to maintain a journal - keeping track of their journey.

I would be curious to see where the consensus goes with this.

laylalikesitall • Mar 4, 2023

Me too My dom will randomly ask me to strip when it’s my bed time and he reaches for his drawer and I know what’s coming. He likes my arms tied behind my back and my feet tied together then attached with a small chain and padlock. Along w my collar and hall gag. I of course comply. I don’t know what prompts him to do this but I trust it’s for my good. What’s strange is I can have a perfect day doing everything exactly how he wants and I’ll be put in the closet to sleep.

SirsBabyDoll​(sub female)​{🍕+☕} • Mar 4, 2023

I'm deeply concerned about this. It is DANGEROUS practice to isolate a person who is tied. Anything could happen.

1) What if you start to have a medical emergency? How woukd he know if you are gagged and shut away?

2) What if HE has a medical emergency? How would you be able to get out?

3) What about nerve damage? Being restrained with your arms behind you can cut off circulation which will also involve nerves (especially with the added pressure of your body weight while you sleep).

Whenever doing any kind of bondage, even if someone is tied to a bed, you are NEVER to be out of sight.

Based ONLY on the information you gave, it is unsafe practice.

SirTOuTOO​{~ 2u2 ~} • Mar 4, 2023

.
.
Great points & advice By 'SBD' above... 'Reflection Time' should be monitored and reasonable in duration. ( even more so when restricted - in any form)
- Other non-physical forms could include - written lines or a notebook essay on the topic.
( but a dialogue should be added so the sub can understand the whys & wherefores of the reprimand. )
.
Steve
2u2

Safety

Sweet p e a​(sub female) • Mar 4, 2023

SBD is right, this is not safe practice, , would you feel confident to address this with your Dom, in the manner you have laid out in your dynamic, for raising questions?

I would say more around the issue that this sounds more like a punishment where none is warranted, rather than time for reflection, but the safety issue is paramount here

pea




quote="SirsBabyDoll"]

I'm deeply concerned about this. It is DANGEROUS practice to isolate a person who is tied. Anything could happen.

1) What if you start to have a medical emergency? How woukd he know if you are gagged and shut away?

2) What if HE has a medical emergency? How would you be able to get out?

3) What about nerve damage? Being restrained with your arms behind you can cut off circulation which will also involve nerves (especially with the added pressure of your body weight while you sleep).

Whenever doing any kind of bondage, even if someone is tied to a bed, you are NEVER to be out of sight.

Based ONLY on the information you gave, it is unsafe practice.[/quote]

ButterfliesAndCuffs​(sub female)​{LJ} • Mar 4, 2023

SBD laid out the dangers of this very well. I hope you feel confident enough to bring these concerns up to your Dom. Remember that you are responsible for your safety as well.
Have you ever asked why he does this? There’s nothing wrong with asking your Dom questions. Of course there’s a limit, but your desire to understand his motivation is normal. In my opinion, that curiosity should be encouraged.
As to your original question, whether it’s a time of reflection or a punishment really just depends on how the individual submissive views it.
Having something like that done to me (in a safer way) because my Dom and I thought it could be hot would obviously not feel like a punishment. However if it was done with no explanation of what I did wrong or previous discussion, I would think I was being punished unfairly.

LongerJohnny​(dom male)​{B&C} • Mar 4, 2023

I confess, I laughed when I read the question, because I thought it was one of those lighthearted "would you rather cut off 1 finger or all 10 toes" kind of questions people ask at parties; not really something many people really worry about, just a hypothetical scenario one would almost surely never find oneself in.
Turns out it was a serious question, already well answered by SBD, but in addition to those SSC concerns I would add a couple more things:
- Before anyone suggests that abandonment can be negotiated as part of your dynamic (which, based ONLY on what you wrote, it wasn't) first consider this: You can not give consent to - or withdraw consent from via safeword - someone who is not present. It is not just unsafe, it is also non-consensual. And you were seemingly not following the guidelines of SSC, RACK, PRICK, or any other such thing since you had no idea why he was doing this to you in the first place.
- Lest anyone tells you otherwise, there is a big difference between abandonment vs simulated, monitored isolation that CAN be negotiated such as in fear play. The former leaves you alone and unsafe and vulnerable for all the reasons you've already been given; the latter only makes you feel those ways.
- My belief is that a Dom's first duty is to take care of his sub. It's not always easy, it's not always possible, but in a situation like the one you describe it definitely will never happen if he isn't physically present. Nobody needs a Dom to compel them to sit alone in a dark closet overnight, we can all pretty much do that for ourselves, but if I were to put my slut in there I would never close the door and walk away. I wouldn't be able to take my eyes or ears off her just in case she needed me.
(Plus there is that little, tiny, hidden sadist part of me that peeks out every now and then just to enjoy watching her suffer!)

Miki​(masochist female) • Mar 5, 2023

Not a sub per se, only a sexual masochist when I ws active but all that aside... None would want ME keeping a journal. More than a few morning entries beginning along the lines of "Hello, fuck-stick! How was your night...." and I'd go on from there peppering other terms of non-endearment in here and there. They'd take the fucking notebook away rather quickly.

As for the closet thing, I'm with the rest of 'em. Too dangerous should there be a medical emergency. I think someone even wrote a horror book about some dude tied up and the captor bites the dust sudden;y. It was not "Misery" but along those lines. Oh yeah it was another King book "Gerald's Game" I believe. Been a long time since I read it but yeah being tied up with no one knowing you're there or that the other one died suddenly. That would tend to suck.

Miki​(masochist female) • Mar 5, 2023

The edit option went away but I wanted to add, with discussion and firm ground work you could do the closet or tied to a bed thing provided you set up safety fallbacks, a responsible (like minded) third party, etc so if anything off the wall happen, someone knows your sub is there and can free her if needed, etc.

Again not fond of this type of thing myself but that's just me. It can be done with safely measures firmly in place--- and over short periods of time.

Just tossing that one out there.