Sincorrigible(sub female)
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6 months ago •
Nov 9, 2023
tallslenderguy wrote: This is a great thread... hilarious, and helps me realize i am not alone in this.
i've had quite a few, and they stayed "first date" because, well, they were "horror dates" and i'm not into horror. Most of mine occurred when i first divorced from a marriage to a woman in 2008 and was dating gay guys. Most of them were the common misrepresentation with old or inaccurate pics. Was disheartening and enlightening. One that stands out early on, maybe one of my first potentially romantic meets was a guy living in Idaho and i was living in Virginia at the time. i confess, i was newly free and out as a gay person, and pretty hungry... i would have gone to Idaho to meet (eek). And, i was pretty stupid, when i can blame a lot on my having been emotionally starved for a long time. Met him online and we had sparks, writing volumes back and forth. Then a 5 hour phone call where he literally proposed to me after we'd only been talking 3 days. Okay, i knew. my rational mind was telling me how ridiculous this was, that all i had was a pic, lots of written exchange and a very long phone call. But my emotional brain craved romance, and he was pushing all my buttons. Of course, i didn't seriously consider marriage, but i was pulled by his romancing me. The phone call was a Saturday... and then he disappeared. Keep in mind, i was new to all this, so be kind towards my idiocy. i was frantic, writing over and over and getting no response after prior daily (continuous) interaction. When he got back in touch, he told me that he was going to have to end our relationship (stop laughing) because he'd "met someone who needed him more than i." i wrote back that i never said anything about "needing" him, the disconnects were plethora, again... my emotions were driving with my rational mind yelling from the back seat and finally getting through. Then he disappeared and i let it all go chiding myself for allowing my emotions to run amok. One month later, he got back in touch and said that it was over between he and the one who "needed him more than i did." At this point i had recovered my senses and all irrational vulnerability was stowed safely in the trunk. i pressed him about the one who needed him more than i did and he finally told me that the one who needed him more than me was an injured cat he'd found. (okay, you can laugh now). No laughing from me. We can see the funny side after, but that emotional vulnerability and starvation is a bad place to be, and when it's taken advantage of, and we take what people tell us, at face value, it HURTS. And what is with that emotional /rational total disconnect???!!! I had a remarkably similar encounter in my very early days. |
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Online now
SnowMinx(sub female){Owned}
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6 months ago •
Nov 9, 2023
tallslenderguy wrote: This is a great thread... hilarious, and helps me realize i am not alone in this.
i've had quite a few, and they stayed "first date" because, well, they were "horror dates" and i'm not into horror. Most of mine occurred when i first divorced from a marriage to a woman in 2008 and was dating gay guys. Most of them were the common misrepresentation with old or inaccurate pics. Was disheartening and enlightening. One that stands out early on, maybe one of my first potentially romantic meets was a guy living in Idaho and i was living in Virginia at the time. i confess, i was newly free and out as a gay person, and pretty hungry... i would have gone to Idaho to meet (eek). And, i was pretty stupid, when i can blame a lot on my having been emotionally starved for a long time. Met him online and we had sparks, writing volumes back and forth. Then a 5 hour phone call where he literally proposed to me after we'd only been talking 3 days. Okay, i knew. my rational mind was telling me how ridiculous this was, that all i had was a pic, lots of written exchange and a very long phone call. But my emotional brain craved romance, and he was pushing all my buttons. Of course, i didn't seriously consider marriage, but i was pulled by his romancing me. The phone call was a Saturday... and then he disappeared. Keep in mind, i was new to all this, so be kind towards my idiocy. i was frantic, writing over and over and getting no response after prior daily (continuous) interaction. When he got back in touch, he told me that he was going to have to end our relationship (stop laughing) because he'd "met someone who needed him more than i." i wrote back that i never said anything about "needing" him, the disconnects were plethora, again... my emotions were driving with my rational mind yelling from the back seat and finally getting through. Then he disappeared and i let it all go chiding myself for allowing my emotions to run amok. One month later, he got back in touch and said that it was over between he and the one who "needed him more than i did." At this point i had recovered my senses and all irrational vulnerability was stowed safely in the trunk. i pressed him about the one who needed him more than i did and he finally told me that the one who needed him more than me was an injured cat he'd found. (okay, you can laugh now). Awwww the romance, im a sucker too. Makes me melt and all brain cells fly out of my head. Im sorry you went through that, sometimes its losing the dreams and hopes that hurt more than losing the person themselves. ♡ |
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tallslenderguy(other male)
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6 months ago •
Nov 9, 2023
Sincorrigible wrote: No laughing from me. We can see the funny side after, but that emotional vulnerability and starvation is a bad place to be, and when it's taken advantage of, and we take what people tell us, at face value, it HURTS. And what is with that emotional /rational total disconnect???!!! I had a remarkably similar encounter in my very early days. Yeah, it did hurt a part of me. Part of my personal development includes practicing vulnerability as a means to connect with others on a more intimate level. Over time, that's become a more careful and refined practice, but it's still vulnerable and can hurt. But to me, when connection happens, it makes those other times worth the price of admission. i don't perceive it as an emotional/rational disconnect, but sort of like (in this case) my emotions were driving and my rationale mind was going along for the ride... even trying to back seat drive (unsuccessfully). By my observation, emotions rule a lot of our decisions. We may do a good job putting a rational mask on them, but peel it back and emotions are grinning behind the serious mask. To me, it's all part of the mediation of life, good to be aware. It really helps me recover more quickly, almost like there is no recovery time... just momentary hurt (not always though). In this case it was pretty obvious to me the whole time that my emotions were not being very smart... still, i let them drive for a bit. |
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tallslenderguy(other male)
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5 months ago •
Nov 9, 2023
SnowMinx wrote: Awwww the romance, im a sucker too. Makes me melt and all brain cells fly out of my head. Im sorry you went through that, sometimes its losing the dreams and hopes that hurt more than losing the person themselves. ♡ i know, right? i even cry (when alone) at cheesy Hallmark commercials. my emotions are an easy mark, but i'm generally on to them and while i allow them, they don't get full say in all my emotions. Mostly, they end up switching during the journey and my rational mind ends up driving. They share the ride, which i think is good. i think most guys stay bound by cultural conditioning and deny the emotional part of their self. i don't think tat denial makes one any less emotional, just less practiced at dealing with their emotions. i think i'm better off this way, that feeling good and feeling bad are two sides of the emotional coin. |
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Miki
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5 months ago •
Nov 11, 2023
I went on dates decades ago, the first one wasn't a horror story but it was annoying. A guy with bad table manners.
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meowineedhelp(sadist trans man)
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5 months ago •
Nov 11, 2023
my worst date came from bumble... the dude was very nice... he had a very... im better than everyone attitude... with a touch of cynicism... anyway we got a long great... maybe he was being manipulative just to get in my pants... but i liked this version of himself he was presenting to me... anyway we get to the bedroom part... he just didnt know how to have sex... then... his pp was the sice of lets say two baby carrots put together... then!!! if that wasn't enough he ghosted me the day after... i thought we were cool so i called him... but then i realize he was not trying to talk to me anymore so that was the end of that...
i see him as a waste of pp.... pps should be valued... he was definitely not valuing his pp at all.... it makes me sad. |
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Sweet Ginger(sub female){⚓ }
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5 months ago •
Nov 12, 2023
SnowMinx wrote: Ill keep going lol. I met this guy for a first date at dinner, then he invited me back to his apartment, I felt comfortable with him so I went. He started doing some weird thing saying he was very spiritual and reading my aura and it was so rare and this amazing red and purple color. My bullshit meter was going off by now. We had kissed a bit but i was feeling a little weird. He went to his room and came back with this little box. I thought for sure it was gonna have a condom in it but nope! It had a Scooby Doo Mystery Van sticker. He said if he puts it on my shoulder it would protect us in sex because its infused with this nanobyte technology etc. I suddenly got a headache and got the hell outta there
  🫨 
"Popcorn time" 
In all seriousness glad you got out of there safely. |
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Miki
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5 months ago •
Nov 14, 2023
.... and on a different first date, the guy really had the balls to try the old "Oh shit! I forgot my wallet" line at pay-the-check time.
So I ended up with the bill, and of course the prick ate a more expensive meal, and when I set the little tray with cash and tip instead of card so I could leave I "accidentally" knocked the water glass over and it spilled right in his lap. Equally original. So, the "wa-wa" made a perfect landing, right on the crotch. The place was busy and he was in denim and had to leave with a water "stain" over his junk. If I could talk I'd have loudly, feigning surprise, asked, "You really pissed in your pants?" But the dark patch spoke for itself as we left. Fortunately we met in separate cars, as I always do when meeting anyone the first time, and of course, he didn't get any ass that night. -------------------------------------------- A couple days later he texted, (Ballsy bro, eh?) --- apologized, and offered to reimburse me. I had long since cooled off and graciously declined, duly considering the possibility he really did forget his wallet, including free advice about avoiding that stunt on his next date. I mean, really? Forgetting one's wallet when going on a date, especially a first one, is along the lines of hanging a leak but forgetting to stuff the schlong back into his pants before zipping his fly. . . |
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Varangian(dom male)
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5 months ago •
Dec 6, 2023
I’m feeling so much better after reading these train wreck stories I thought I would share some of my own.
I met this beautiful women, (long blonde hair, blue eyes, petite, great ass, jeans looked like they were painted on, plenty of tattoos and piercings) at a coffee shop we had exchanged pleasantries before over the past week in passing. She asked if she could join me at my table since there was no more available. Duh of course yes. We are talking, laughing, flirting, no weird pauses in the conversation time was flying by we had been talking for about 3 hours and it seemed like minutes before her toned changed. Her “Can I be frank” Me “Who will I be then” Her “I’m looking for a good white boy to marry and take care of me and my 5 biracial children” In the three hours we had been talking not one mention of children now 5 Her “I have 5 children by 4 different men that are all doing time in prison 2 of them doing life” I could hear that train whistle approaching Her “ I want to be a stay at home mom even though all my children go to school during the day” Trains getting closer Her “I want a good white boy to marry me and adopt my 5 children “ Me “What” Her “You have to know though that I love black men and will continue to date and fuck them” Me “Excuse me” looking around for hidden cameras Her “Not to worry I will give you a handy or blowy on your birthday as long as you are faithful to me” Is that train speeding up Me still looking around for cameras think my mouth was open and I swallowed a fly Me “Well good luck finding your white boy, I’m not him” got up from the table still looking for those hidden cameras, went to my truck as soon as I pulled into the street that train wiped out the entire patio of that coffee shop. I was lucky to get away in one piece. |
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Steellover(sub male)
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5 months ago •
Dec 7, 2023
That almost sounds like someone deliberatly TRYING to scare you off. Either way...no thanks. Five kids by four different men? All four of which are in prison? Yikes; I know some women like "Bad Boys," but again...train wreck city.
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