So I've talked to a couple of friends over the last week or so and during this past week at an festival of fetish I attended this last week.
I was asked a couple of times how it was and how did I feel about the experience.
I can say that the dungeon experience was something that was a bit overwhelming the first evening. It was so many different style of play and so many people. So so so many people. Normally I'm the type that can walk into a munch or a social gathering and I will meet everyone. I enjoy getting to know people and their journeys. As Ive considered myself green before attending, I now realized that I've not even skimmed the surface of what I want to learn about. Now don't get me wrong, I have had some of the most amazing experiences, some of which will remain with me for the rest of my life. Things that have taught me and shown me that I know somewhat who I am. After this weekend, I realized that this journey is going to be a lot more.
I watched the different styles and seen some toys that I have and haven't used yet, being used in ways that I wouldn't have thought of. Way to inflict more deliciousness. I learned to finally throw a whip and felt so good in starting. Long road there but one I am confident now I will accomplish.
Before the event I wanted to learn more about suspension. It is something that I've always wanted to learn but was so in my head about it. The worries about the dangers just got me where I was concerned if it was something I would accomplish. In talking and classes on it, I've learned that it is not only something I am more excited to learn about, but that it isn't as much as I thought it would be. Don't get me wrong, I won't be putting someone in the air solo in a scene anytime soon, but the things that had been holding that back in my head are gone.
The biggest growth for me was inside. The learning of things in a D/s dynamics. It made me take a long hard look at myself and my past in this realm. Made me see the things that I have done wrong. The ways I had reacted and that there is always a better way to handle it. The way I would often turn to emotional or end of the world scenarios in a dynamic and not being open enough to listen, take in and properly guide the dynamic to the place desired. It made me realize that while we can title ourselves or call ourselves Sir,Dom Daddy etc... that we have to live it. With someone or not. We are who we are and when we enter into a dynamic we need to be consistent and not change ourselves. That yes we should encourage our subs to have friends outside of our dynamic and not alienate them from there's, which I've never done, BUT we also have to ensure that we are taking that time to ourselves. Allowing ourselves to be involved with people of similar interests, different interests and that have or are living the lifestyle and dynamics in their own way. I've often cut myself off with friends and put all of me into my dynamic. While it seemed right, I can also see that it changed me and who I was from the start and became the ultimate ending.
Overall I can say it was an experience that completely filled me with so much to grow and learn from and did make me a better person from just being there.
