Its easy to feel like a cyclone. Like i leave a path of destruction along the way. To take in the feelings of others to fuel my storm. But my path is becoming more clearer now with each hard step forward.
Will it hurt.... oh hell yes. I hate to disappoint people or hurt them, which in turn hurts me. But staying where i am doesn't help anybody. Only masks my pain.
Will I loose people along the way? Most assuredly. They will see me as selfish or just not understand. They will judge me and try to fit me in their boxes so they can analyze me later. But by then I will be gone.
Will I be happy? Thats the plan ?. To stay true to myself. To actually listen to my own desires for once and take control of my own future. Instead of letting life dribble past me, in a place that makes my soul sad. Giving everything i can to please and hold on but for what? Why stay when it only makes me worse...... that never helps anybody.
So I take a deep breath and keep pushing forward. Apologies if I hurt people but explain that this is the path I must take. Trying to minimize the damage I leave. And reach out for the hand trying to help me through....
