He said he would ruin me for all others. That he would make me crave only him. At the time it made me smile and on the inside I didn't think that would be possible to have such an effect or hold on me. But he was right. He did everything he set out to do but i did not realise the effect until he was gone. Without a word and without a trace.
Now even after time I am still in love with a ghost. And i think i forever will be. I am thankful to have known such a feeling but it also hurts. I desire the control but also i loved his affect on me. I flourished under his care and I now struggle with the fact that i can not be so well adjusted without the rules, the structure and love. No matter what i try. I also dont wish to fill that void. Because it is his chair and his alone.
A part of me still waits patiently but i feel it is a lost cause. He will not return but yet my heart still waits. Forever and always his star
