Sentimentality and kink.... you either relate to them or you don't. The latter seems to be far more subject to individual preference, and harder for the average person to relate to, and thus I often tend to feel more guilty whenever I post about it. When I do, it's because I ignore my own rule- don't post when horny. Maybe I should be punished? Ah crap there I go...
Anyway, with that said, this post one be about that. (Promise!) It will be sentimental, about the good times. Hopefully more people can relate to this one.
About 15, maybe 20 years ago, there was a group of us here in town. We'd get together at the clubs to watch each other's bands play live. It was a fun crowd of music fans, artists, and musicians. I played a little guitar but wasn't in a band, but contributed more as a visual artist and was nonetheless close with that group. We'd go out on the town, all meet up at the bar, all sit at a table, listen to the music, rock out, socialize, have fun, have some drinks.
But all good things fade away eventually, don't they. People left the scene, started families, drifted away, or moved away. The bands we played in stopped playing. COVID and the ensuing lockdowns happened and that pretty much drove the final nail into it. And now, some of them are leaving this entire plane of existence, moving to the next dimension, where Jesus rocks with all of us old rockers together. Most of us are not THAT old, all what you would call gen-X/Pre-millennials, but nonetheless I've lost two close friends in the last year, one of them succumbing to the effects of hard drinking and heavy smoking, the other not so much succumbing but rather SURRENDERING to a seemingly insurmountable opioid addiction.
Last weekend, we got together to honor one of our fallen friends. It was both bittersweet and at the same time, joyous. It would be a cliche to say he was with us in spirit, and that, as he said, he would have preferred to go out on stage, entertaining us with his music. (and he was certainly far from the first person who has said this, by the way.) But it was true. It was like he was there, as we were there for him. His band did a tribute to him, playing his songs, so that they would live on. Guests came up and filled in for him. Two other bands played, one of them being another of his past bands. The guitarist's son even filled in admirably on bass; he's in his mid-20s now; the same age as we were then.
We are all a little older now, most of us a little grayer, a little more heavy-set, and maybe not quite as tirelessly energetic as we were 10, 15 or 20 years ago. But yet, it was like no time had passed. We all hung out, rocked out to the music, drank cocktails, sat at the big round tables together, stood around and shared stories, talked music, bands, art, sports, or just shared crazy stories. Everyone together again, people I hadn't seen, in many cases, since before the isolating horrors of 2020.
And it was just like those glorious nights long ago. The veil of loneliness and isolation lifted, being part of a group of communal kindred spirits, for a short while, and all of us missing our fallen friend, who had this wild energy that could lift the mood of a whole room simply by bursting in and exclaiming, "I love you man!" Reliving the past yet feeling in the moment of the now. I miss my friends who are gone, but I'm grateful for nights like the other night. I wish that could happen again as it once did. The old group, together for one more time. And I hope it's not the last.
All of us- cherish the ones you love, but also the friends who make your life a little brighter, more fulfilling, positive, and more joyful.