Rose's Thorns.

A general pondering.

Oh the irony

3 years ago. May 24, 2021 at 3:03 AM

Why is it everytime i tell a man im into bdsm and submissive two things always happen

Instantly thinks im up for anything (yes anything) just automatically assumes this after a quick conversation. It's an odd look of amazement, unbridled excitement and panic. It's an odd combination as you can see the list of things he thinks might happen from porn induced fancies. As a consequence most respect goes.

Secondly the combination of lust of the porn fantasies combined with pleading and begging. I don't know what what happens but the guy's always seem taken over by something akin to lust that makes them beg like anything. Or they straight up get offended when you say no because they have their own fantasy and actually prefer the fantasy to the real life. Basically think your a maid with sex benefits.

Thing is i just told you im submissive.... do either of those responses seem in anyway Dominant to you? As in what a sub is attracted to? Because i don't. The irony amuses me.

CSI - Oh how I feel this post so much. I have lived it. Sheesh. Some people just make me shake my head

3 years ago

rosethorn(sub female) - Thing is there isn't much you can do in this situation

3 years ago

MissBonnie(dom female){oz} - Further irony is even Domme women get the same response. its assumed that be somehow being Domme...you leave all morals behind as soon as those words leave your mouth LOL

women sure do get to kiss a lot of toads before they find their prince

3 years ago

rosethorn(sub female) - It's interesting its both sub and Domme with the same response

3 years ago

Curiousmind(sub female){Owned} - Personally I would never tell a vanilla man i am into bdsm/submission because it would be impossible to build a fulfilling relationship. I would taste the ground first to see what attracts him on the sexual level. If i sense he is a dominant I would proceed by opening up about my sexuality.
From reading your words it’s clear these men are vanilla men 😊

3 years ago

CSI - I know it has happened to me on The Cgae with men that have said they were dominant.

3 years ago

Curiousmind(sub female){Owned} - Well 😊...those men are definitely not true dominants!

3 years ago

WhatamIfightingfor(dom male){CurvyB} - A phase that is supposed to be grown out of, and after a few relationships should be long past vanilla or not.

3 years ago

Voldemort(dom male) - They have a preconceived idea about tge term submissive. They don't even understand it in its integrality.

3 years ago

rosethorn(sub female) - You hit the nail on the head. There is no understanding of what it takes to be a sub and no respect. They just see you as wish fulfillment

3 years ago

Bunnie - Lol all I can do is laugh. Brings back memories. This is precisely why I only date within circles of people who already identify as practitioners of BDSM.

3 years ago

rosethorn(sub female) - Yup. Every so often tho it just slips out

3 years ago

sexycurves(sub female) - That's happened to me. Not that I have said that I am a sub or Domme, but they do tend to assume I'm one or the other. In their assumption, they have a certain expectation from me and it's so annoying.

3 years ago

GiyuuSimp(switch female) - It's a mixture of upbringing and the porn they watch. They haven't got a clue what a aubmissive is and how to approach and communicate to a sub properly. So basically they are ignorant.

3 years ago

GiyuuSimp(switch female) - *submissive

3 years ago

rosethorn(sub female) - I know porn gets a lot of the blame in general and honestly i wouldn't know as i don't watch any, but i suspect its a stereotype of bdsm.

3 years ago

GiyuuSimp(switch female) - Google bdsm porn and go to images. 9 out of the 10 images the women are getting heavily degraded. That may be a clue.

3 years ago

rosethorn(sub female) - I'd rather not subject my eyes to that if thats okay and take your word for it. Thing is people actually think its accurate and build a fantasy image in their heads, they can't cope when its not real then either shout and throw a tantrum or think the fantasy is so fragile it breaks unless they plead like anything. Usually looks like the video i put up.

3 years ago

GiyuuSimp(switch female) - Yup, that sounds about right! You sound like you dealt with more than your share of these types of people.

3 years ago

rosethorn(sub female) - I call it adult temper tantrums, like a two year old.

3 years ago

WhatamIfightingfor(dom male){CurvyB} - After some reading on TV tropes, a rather popular genre of movie from the late 90s did not help, even the early Leisure Suit Larry games you had to earn the girl.

3 years ago

rosethorn(sub female) - Yeah films were you chase and win the girl really haven't helped

3 years ago

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rosethorn​(sub female)

Rose's Thorns.

Oh the irony

rosethorn(sub female)