Well it has been some time since I have shared here,or written here as such.
As I make my way thru my journey with this thing or lifestyle ,connection with feelings that I have had for a l o n g time, decades in the acceptance of what I feel , and what I want.
Yes I am a newbie to the lifestyle and yes I need to learn alot..I have been attending Munch's, and meeting new people, I was told to this ,So that is what I am doing.,as newbies should do. so that being said.
I should be patient. Period. Though in the mad rush to rush into this , it became a obsession to fit in and join , of course it was hit with rejection , no answers, and looks like that I was crazy.
A little bit about me, I am a 58 year old, white bisexual, masochist. There are the majority of the internet filled with men like me. And somehow I think I'm special. Well I am just an average Joe in the boat.
Also I am sober member about Alcoholic Anonymous. 5 years, and my connection with God as I call him and my recovery are the two most important things in my life. You want to talk about slipping through the cracks in this yes.
In the last few months I recognize the obsession that I was doing with this lifestyle, thankfully I recognized it. I know if I keep doing what is right oh, that I will be placed where I should be. Not where I want to be. Not when I want to be, and not with who I want.
A good internet friend chat person told me not to settle for less period sounds like good advice have a good night.
As I sit in my big bubble bath at home, I think it's okay.
