I saw a really good discussion on a status this morning on another site about the term "alpha" as it pertains to submissives. I jumped in and learned some stuff, and started forming an opinion of my own on the topic. Fun :)
I've always been uncomfortable with the term even when it comes to dominants, but even more so with submissives. It seems like a throwaway word, a weak descriptive word, while the word "Dominant" also implies an action, to dominate. A submissive, submits.
An alpha sub? I saw several different definitions of alpha sub, it was helpful for me to read through them and think about why exactly I'm not fond of the word.
The old definition of alpha sub described the first sub in a poly household, the one responsible for training the other subs and handing out duties. With the rise of a much more informal version of D/s & M/s, this has mostly fallen by the wayside and many aren't aware of it at all. I'm new to this world, though I am older, so this was new to me.
Others described it as something that some subs, perhaps more insecure than others, would use to describe themselves to make them stand out from all the other subs, to seem better? I don't think anyone is better or worse than someone else. We're all different, special to ourselves but we're still just people. But I can see the term being used that way.
Others described the alpha sub as someone who is dominant in their work world, for whom submission is a temporary escape from the pressures of the job. Something was said about how these women don't have a weakness that means they need a Dom to help or strengthen them, to paraphrase one commenter, they are all strength and power and just WANT to hand that over. Hmmm, doesn't seem very sub-like to me, but ok if some like that definition, or parts of it.
I am in the corporate world myself, and I am a leader. I'm not at the top of the totem pole by any means, but I have influence, and I lead a team. I have gotten comfortable in this man's world, and I enjoy my job. I've gotten to this place by emulating other women who check their passive aggressive bullshit at the door, say what needs to be said, and put in the work.
However, I would not call myself an alpha sub - I'm sure many women like me feel the same way. To me the work world is the temporary place where I go to make money, though I do enjoy it and I'm good at it. Now that I've found my way here, submission is not my escape. Submission is my home, and slavery is my joy.
My two cents for today :)
